Feeling inadequate, 26 year old guy that has never had a girlfriend before?

I’m 26 years old; I never had a girlfriend, never kissed a girl, never been on a date, never had sex. I sometimes I wonder that I’m strange. I feel in inadequate. I see all my friends having girlfriends. I see them finding love, and a huge part of me wants that special someone.

The thing is that for most of my life, I wanted to have someone to love me for me. I yearned for that. I spent many years depressed almost to the brink of suicide, wanting a girl to love me. In my darkness hours, when I’m by myself, I keep on asking, why I can’t I find a girl that likes me romantically. I’m tired just being a friend to girls. It’ll be nice for once for a girl to look at me at a romantic way.

The thing is I'm way too nervous, shy and completely inexperienced. If a woman was flirting with me, I wouldn't even know she was as I am slow on social cues. I try to be myself and be genuine when I meet and talk to women, but they don't seem to be romantically interested in me.

I appreciate all the advice I can get, thanks for listening, and allowing me to share my struggle


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Look. You have to make a move. I know you said your shy and all that. But if your shy and quit all the time. How are you going to start a conversation with a girl? You need to open up and start talking to girls. Ask her questions? What you like? What things you like doing? Stuff like that. Be yourself... Make her smile... Then ask her on a date and stuff like that...
    I don't think online dating would be nice. But you can give it a try... I even heard people here in gag are dating each other... But don't you loose hope!!!

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Most Helpful Guy

  • I am facing the exact same problems as you and I'll be 25 in a couple months. Online dating never worked out good for me in the 2 years I've been on it. I've been asking around on Gag and people recommend meeting girls through sports clubs, volunteering, classes, coworkers, church, and everyday life. Unfortunately I work 60 hours a week with coworkers that live more than an hour away from me, and I rarely see girls in public. All in all, I haven't had a face to face convo with a girl since college. And I have all the nervousness and shyness you have. I'm going to try volunteering, church, and dance classes or a sports club if I can fit it in. Not everyone doing these things is single though, or what you're looking for...

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    • The best advice I've received is not to be nervous. Girls are people too. If they reject you, which can be scary, then they aren't the right person. I'm not sure how long it takes for a girl to become romantically interested, but if they enjoy talking with you then that's the best start you can ask for.

What Girls Said 2

  • You are not. Don't give up!

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  • Try online dating but also work on your self confidence. Can You blame a woman for not wanting a man so timid that he's not willing to make a move? Don't just except that part about yourself. Make a move. Make a change. I'm sure you're a nice guy but you gotta be a man and apart of being a man is making moves even when you are scared. Best wishes.

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    • Most of the women I fall for are taken anyway so even if I wanted to ask them, it would feel wrong.

What Guys Said 2

  • seems to be more common than we think

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  • I think you are acting so passive and timid when you first meet a girl that by the time you decide to actually make a move on her she has long lost any romantic interest and has friendzoned you.
    If you are being too friendly too soon most girls will think of you as a doormat.
    You should improve your social skills by putting yourself out there. Just mix and mingle. Don't think of finding the one. Every girl you meet can be the one, the question is can you make it work?

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