To female feminists - How should guys who are interested in you approach you?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I don't know if I'm a feminist - I am an 'equalist'... xD

    I say be honest, but flirt a bit first - being waaaaay too upfront way too quickly scares most women off, or makes them think the dude doesn't want to waste his time on a girl - or makes them think the guy already predicts he's going to be denied, so they deny him...

    So honest and a bit fun/ny - flirty - works for me. =)

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    • see this is the problem... some of you say flirt first, while others like prettygurl's response say if i flirt first, im basically viewing you like a piece of meat... And this is really why i usually avoid approaching feminists altogether because i risk a lot by doing so

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    • Cool! Thank you ^-^

    • you're welcome :)

What Girls Said 14

  • I'm not a feminist. But I think most people are really bad at approaching for romance. I'm surprised so many people are getting laid.

    Personally, just be upfront. I'm not a good person to flirt with, I prefer to get to the point. You are interested in a date, cool. Just say it. You are interested in just getting to know me, I'll ask why but still, just say it. Hell, even if you're interested in just fucking, just say it.
    Don't get it twisted though. Just you asking will not guarantee a yes from me. But I will respect you and all men in general a little more if you just tell me wtf because I'm too old to be pussyfooting around.
    We're adults. I know it can be nerve-wracking, but I prefer bluntness.

    I'm more of a brutal honesty and direct type of person though. So this obviously doesn't apply to every girl.

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    • yeah i probably won't be confessing my sexual interest anytime soon, haha. it conflicts with too many women, like Prettygurl's response... but i see what you're saying

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    • yeah fair enough. I don't really have the attributes that girls want for a DTF one night stand though so that option is kinda out for me

    • Oh, you'd be surprised.

  • You know what dude? Just be straight with me.

    "Hey, I'm into you and would like to get to know you better." --> straightforward, to the point and not at all creepy.

    I'm not bothered who pays (it makes me uncomfortable to talk about money, but it also makes me uncomfortable to have my shit paid for so I'm always uncomfortable) and I *really* don't care if you open doors for me or whatever. I open doors for people because it's a nice thing to do.

    I can't really think of anything beyond don't coddle me. I've got multiple degrees in engineering, I'm not stupid. There's no reason to treat me like a child (though I'm admittedly terrible at euphemisms, but that's bilingualism for ya.)

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    • do you have a problem with guys you don't know approaching you and saying that? Like, if a guy is physically attracted to you and hence curious about you, would you still accept that?

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    • hmm alright. ill try it out. if i get castrated, ill just blame you :)

    • Occupational hazard.

  • Slowly... from behind 😉

    Jk I have no idea 😛

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  • Respectfully
    Nicely

    "Hey, (insert something about something not sexual or sleazy and everything should be good to go)"

    Maybe,
    "hey that was a great game"
    "hey I saw you ordered a blah blah, that's my favorite"
    "hey, my name is ZootyBooty."

    I would prefer if he didn't just say I was pretty or whatever. I would prefer a few minutes into the conversation he said something nice like "You have great eyes" but I would like if he didn't focus too much on my face because it's easy to give off the vibe that all he wants is my body/face, ya know"

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  • Don't start off with a compliment on how I look. I am not a piece of meat.

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    • I appreciate compliments on hiw I look. Just because they compliment you on that doesn't mean they think you're a piece of meat. Especially if they don't know you, don't they pretty much have to start with what they see?

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    • this becomes confusing with some feminists, which is why i tend to not approach feminists if i know they identify as one. I dont understand why a compliment means that i view you as a piece of meat. a person can be both pretty and intelligent. One does not negate the other in my mind

    • Oh yes I totally agree with that prettygurl. Those kinds of comments are never welcome. But a nice "you look really pretty" or "I love your hair" type thing is fine with me.

  • Ask about my night/day, appreciate that I work hard, ask what I think about things.

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  • Just be friendly nothing special, just common sense of how you would like to be approached.

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  • " hi my name is ___ , I saw you and just thought you were really beautiful/pretty/gorgeous " . I'd say something alone the lines of " Oh well thank you , I'm flattered. I'm ___ , nice to meet you " if I wasn't interested I would simply tell them thank you but I am not interested

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    • I don't understand why girl have an issue with a man complimenting them? I mean as long as it's not degrading like " aye girl nice ass , or damn you sexy " . Keep it classy , but damn. You girls are some weirdos

    • I think that if I approached a girl and said "hey, my name is x and I think ur gorgeous", I think she would think one of two things 1) oh another dude calling me gorgeous, whatever, 2) he only likes me for my looks. Am I right or wrong? Apparently only hot guys can get away with a direct opener. The rest of us have to open indirectly: like "hey that's an awesome drink, gives me a headache though, anyway how's..."

  • Respect me as the Law

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  • By not telling me how great my boobs look

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    • You don't have to worry about that, you don't have any XD

  • Talk to me?

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    • do you have a problem with guys you don't know approaching you and talking to you because they think you're physically attractive and are hence curious about you?

    • Anyone that I know now was once a stranger, so I guess it would be okay if it was done in a 'not so creepy way'
      Also, I'm not really looking for 'relationships' so it's better if they don't have 'high hopes'

  • By being a gentleman its enough

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  • You'll never get a correct answer to this response. Because before feminists, we are women. And women don't even know what they want. Seriously. The answers to this question will range from 0 to gravity. Did that even make sense? I bet it didn't lol

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  • My advice--> RUN!
    Seriously don't get involve with a feminist. She'll suck the blood out of you for her rights and won't respect you back. Will play the victim role and make you feel like a criminal.

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What Guys Said 10

  • The best way to approach an feminist is just like Beerus in 1:02 minute on this video. :D

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X9QbYDLAkOk

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  • Honestly it depends on the degree of feminist. While most are fine just to walk up to, I know a few (extremely radical) feminists that get offended if you try to talk to them as a guy.

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  • Why would one do such a thing?

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  • Feminists have a damaged view of men and frankly have exceedingly poor social skills and poor social intelligence. Seriously, the problem is with them, not you. So don't go out of your way to accommodate them. That's like giving a tantrum tossing child what they want to appease them. It doesn't do anyone any good.

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  • It doesn't matter since guys are not interested in feminists anyway.

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  • Well, according the The Guardian, not acting like a male feminist is a start. :P

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  • You don't.
    Don't do it bruh.

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  • "Hey sugar tits, you look like you need some D!"

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  • With a collar around your neck

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  • I don't think feminism has much to do with it though does it? I mean aren't most girls feminists?

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