My boyfriend is 28 and im 24 and we have been together 4.5 years and we are looking to move in together real soon. Well i know how much he has in his banl account because we are starting our lives together. Well his mom asked him how much he had and he said he feels she doesn't need to know that and she got all upset saying well you told your girlfriend and you can't tell your own mother i have more of a right to know than she does. I actually feel the opposite was how much money he has in no way effects her but it effects me since we are going to be living together and sharing things. Who is right?
Most Helpful Guy
There's never really a right or wrong.. there's always just points of view. I happen to agree with you on this. Mom's have trouble letting go of the control they have over their kids, which is pretty understandable... they fear the worse and want to help.
But boys turn into men, and as men need to take back control of their own destinies. It's perfectly healthy and within reason for him to have his own privacy, especially around his own money.
And it also makes sense to be open and completely transparent with our significant partners, especially if you're going to be living together. You both need to have full access to all bills and money, etc. Shared responsibilities.
He needs to be gentle with his mom, but firm and assertive.. and loving.
But clear boundaries with her are pretty healthy.
It's when husbands won't share their bank info with their own wives that makes me angry. :P