Guys, quick input: do you play games with girls that you think are out of your league to get them to like you more?

I swear this guy I'm talking to is purposely playing hard to get. Normally guys don't... But his signals are so sporadic and weird that none of my friends can tell me what to do with him anymore. Of course they tell me to move on since they think I'm gorgeous and can get any guy, but I really like this guy... And I keep trying only for him to give me so much thread and then snap it back. He isn't a player or doesn't talks to a lot of girls.. He's reserved, in band and totally into school (like me) and I don't think girls go after him a lot. I thought maybe he's playing mind games with me to make me like him more? Like he will ignore me for a week and then bounce back like nothing happened. Or seeing me once a week seems big to him? Yet he never messages me, even when I message him. I don't get it.


What Guys Said 2

  • I wouldn't bother guys that are playing games with you, move on quickly, here is why?
    Nothing truly beautiful ever asks for attention. This quote has stuck with me ever since I heard my coworker speak the words. Nothing truly beautiful ever asks for attention – it just naturally exists, as it is, in confidence and boldness.

    Remember this the next time you chase someone you think you love. Remember this the next time you feel as if you need to compete for the attention of someone you admire. Generationally speaking, we often feel the need to prove ourselves to the heart we regard. We often feel the need to change ourselves to better suit their needs, we often wonder if we are exactly what they are looking for, or if they have other options. I have heard the sentiment many times over, I have seen it dissect beautiful moments and sensationalize less than beautiful relationships. Stop the “If onlys” and the “But maybes.” Trust me when I say that those do not exist within the boundaries of the love you want. They only exist within the reality of the love you chase.

    The most awe-inspiring person I ever had the privilege of loving planted his feet firmly in front of me and said “This is what I want.” There was courage, transparency. There was declaration.

    There was no insecurity, there was no need to compare myself to others or compete. The most awe-inspiring person I ever had the privilege of loving chose me every single day, and I chose him. When that wasn’t the case, we parted ways. We didn’t drag it out, we didn’t try to convince the other. We didn’t feel the need to grip, and chase something that did not fulfill us or inspire us. It was natural, and organic, and it allowed for me to feel deeply and confidently. That is the kind of love you want.

    • Do not chase another human being. Instead, chase your curiosity. Chase your development and your goals. Chase your passion. Strive to work for something bigger than yourself, and instead of trying to convince someone that you fit within their world, strive to build your own.

      Relationships are not melting pots. They are unions. You walk into them with your own visions, your own hunger, and when you are confident in that, when you allow for that to thrive within you, you never break yourself down to appease the pursuit. You simply exist, as you are, and when you meet someone who does as well, when you meet someone who chooses you within that, you thrive together, and that creates a dynamic that is ever growing and influential.

      Nothing beautiful ever asks for attention. Let that be a testament. The truly carnal relationship, the attraction, the pull to another human being – it simply survives. It flourishes. It is the kind of beauty that lives within ribcages, that surges throughout bones, that you cannot explain, that allows you to “just know.” It is never bred from contest; it is never bred from uncertainty. You will never have to work to inspire it within someone, because it will simply exist within them.

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    • I just took a bath and just want to let you know that your words really resonated with me... I feel much more reassured and internally calm. You've got a wonderful point, and I really appreciate you sharing this.

    • no worries your welcome

  • Yeah he is playing hard to get. Maybe he doesn't want to fall for you hard since your attractive. So he keeps his feelings and emotions in check. Maybe he also lacks dating experience so that would explain part of his weird behavior. I think part of you likes him because he gives you a big challenge.

    • Haha most definitely. I have 10+ guys talking to me right now. And the guy I am obsessing over? Him. I would drop the others in a second for him. I would dance around the room and scream if he messaged me first ever. Haha I'm so lame. But I just for some reason really like him...

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    • Fingers crossed :p thank you!

    • Your very welcome. ☺