I just had to break up with my boyfriend a few minutes ago. It hurts me so bad but I'm just trying to look out for myself. (I'm having his child in a month). No matter how much I show that I love him he seems ungrateful. I want him to see me as a future wife or someone he wants to spend his life with. I am supportive, I cook, I clean and so much more. He always has an issue with me and he nags at everything that I do. I get the impression that he holds no interest in me. I feel like he wants a different woman in his life because he wants constant change from me to be his ideal woman but no matter what, he remains unhappy with me. I was wondering when he does find his ideal woman, will he treat her a lot better than me just because she's perfect for him? Or will he always be stuck in his ways as an ungrateful man?
Do you enter into relationships trying to do all those things for the guy, to "please" him, before he asks? Because you may be presenting yourself as a doormat, and as an easy person who gives, rather than someone who asks for something, and clearly defines their personal boundaries and expectations. If you don't want to be treated poorly, perhaps don't allow someone to? Ending that relationship was a good step for you, just continue to reflect on your own behaviour, and try not to compromise yourself too much.
I suppose some people don't change. Others learn. I realized very late that I had lacked empathy until I was 20. I would pardon things girlfriends did to me, without asking myself or them why it happened. I just shrugged and pardoned, copying the way my dad behaved. I should have had some really deep and kind conversations with them instead, inquiring into their state of mind which lead them to do it. And then after my last break up I met a girl who didn't need to be interrogated but was very open. We're still happy together.
Shutting up and suffering doesn't help. Shrugging and pardoning doesn't help. Fighting is even worse. The keywords are GOODWILL and COMMUNICATION. I hope this helps.
He doesn't like you. You think he ungrateful? well I think that u are selfish because your only thinking of yourself not of him? And yes I heard that you will change for him but it won't cut it! He feels what he feels and you can't force love. You seems a bit strange because you are so desperate and okay to change! You need to stand your ground because it appears you are losing respect for yourself... you will soon realize it... or not I think you should leave and seek some therapy!