Why do girls never feel pretty/beautiful?

Girls seem nuts. With makeup, which majority of women in the west wear, and as long as one is not fat, and weight is the number 1 thing most girls watch, it is really difficult for girls not to look at least attractive.

I don't normally give girls complements on their looks as I'm sure so many are used to it/have heard it before.

But the more I speak to some girls about it the more it become apparent that they are genuinely unhappy with how they look. If a guy complements you on your looks girls, do you automatically feel he's after something rather than being genuine?

Also, why don't girls feel good when it's clear that they're attractive. Like 95% of girls on tinder look good but the same can't be said for guys.

Do girls really feel that unhappy? If so, can girls explain why?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Some people are down on themselves. plenty of men dont feel beautiful as well, but i guess since you're not into men you dont care.

    I've never felt ugly and i dont feel unhappy with myself. i think assuming this is how girls are is like saying girls are just insecure and fragile. thats not the case. yo can as find someone to support a stereotype but for the most [art women are obviously content bc they get yp go to woprkl have lives and are not shutting in and trying to off themselves.

    al;so beauty is not the most important thing., asking this question its as if a woman needs to be or think she's beautiful to be successful psychologically. there are much more important virtues like strength intelligence courage altruism conviction force of personality... people dont write articles on women feeling powerful and courageous they write articles on women feeling ugly or not taking a compliment or taking too many compliments.

    beauty really shouldn t be the big deal its made out to be. where to 'sympathize ' is to try to prove a person has beauty or commiserate bc they dont, instead pf paying attention to much more important things. its demoralizing. and i think its very uninteresting,. its not a travesty if a woman or man does not feel beautiful. the shame is if that person thinks that not having that feeling is the end of the war;ld or renders them useless.

    the way you're writing this is like women should not feel good if they are not attractive. no person is attractive to everyone and some people are not attractive physically to many. that does not make their lives meaningless.

    as for me if a guy compliments me i dont have difficulty accepting it bc i dont see why its not believable. but it doesn't elevate him in my eyes just bc he's complimented me. i really dont see why you'd care what a woman (an attractive woman) thinks about your complimenting her unless you had some kin of mnotive.

    why is it important to you to compliment anyone on how they look., something as fleeting and superficial as an appearance. why does it bother so many people top not have their compliment taken seriously. i think if you compliment concrete parts of a personality people would take it more seriously. you could try that.

    think about it. why would you be complimenting someones looks. when they dont have too much control over that and in doing so you're emphasizing the unimportance of the rest of them?

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    • i think compliments should be reserved for concrete things a person can actually work at and accomplish and not things that are mostly based on luck.

      when you break it down, if were being honest, complimenting a look is like saying i wan to fuck you or, i with i was fuckable like you. its lustful or envious... neither vey productive ibn the scheme of things. people really shouldn't feel; high or low depending on whether they got complimented on their luck. its pretty perverse. in my opinion.

Most Helpful Guy

  • Real Answer:
    Girls all want the top 20% of men. There life long dream is to marry a man who is handsome, rich and has high social status.

    http://i.imgur.com/eHrO9mV.jpg

    By there being a hotter woman than them in their area, means their chance of getting that dream gets a little bleaker and they'll have to settle for an average guy. This is why they get depressed and insecure when they see a hotter girl than them.

    http://i49.tinypic.com/2wn8ylw.jpg

    The hotter girl would draw more men to them and knock these girls out of the competition for the rich, hot guy.

    wisance.com/.../Jealous-woman-watching-couple.jpg

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What Girls Said 24

  • The "it" look is always changing.
    Currently it's a huge ass and perfect contoured makeup. The beauty ideal for women is always changing and most of us are constantly chasing perfection.
    We don't feel good enough because all beauty supplies and products are advertised to women. WE have to look out best, OUR naked bodies are plastered everywhere, WE are used as sexual objects to sell products. We constantly have the ideal woman shoved in our face, and it's worse that this ideal image is also shoved in men's faces. This is what they see as ideal and expect the women around them to be gorgeous, or at least that what girls think. That guys have all these beautiful women shoved in their face and they could never want a plain Jane girl who doesn't care about fashion hair or make up

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  • because there's always going to be someone prettier, sexier, better, etc. lol. what you've got is never enough.

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    • Omg! I never understood it. I used to dated a gorgeous girl and if we ever were out at a nice restaurant I saw her face get all sad or look away. I'd look in the direction and see another gorgeous woman. I always made sure to let her know how beautiful she was after that. But I just wanted to say "why? Your hot! She's hot! But I like you!"

    • That's actually really sad. Of course there's always going to be someone better. For guys, there's always going to be someone who's tallter/has more muscle/has more money/better career. But we don't really take much notice of them and just focus on ourselves. For girls, it seems they care so much more about what those around them think of them :/

    • @tenchu11
      @QA

      I don't know dudes. i wish we didn't care so much about that stuff, but we do. well some of us lol. i can't imagine -not- constantly comparing. so i have a sad future ahead of me :p

  • I am not sure! I guess its the media telling us we are pretty enough. We don't have the slim waste or we aren't skinny enough. And then we have people who are naturally over weight or a special type of gene! Sure they can improve but not like the girls in the magazines! The media and what people think of me have forever scar me! So, when someone tell me I am pretty I rather ignore it because I believe I am not but I also believe I have a wonderful kind hearted soul!

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  • Because there are still stipulations like: "as long as they're not fat."

    People constantly say there are x, y, and z reasons why someone is or isn't attractive. We create labels, we create social standards and expectations, we glorify particular types of beauty in media, books, and so forth, and then we don't properly teach our children about self esteem. So, we are left asking ourselves: Am I beautiful?

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  • For me personally when I guy compliments me it's not because he is a friend or being nice he is trying to hit on me. Also men don't tend to just tell girls they r beautiful randomly and I feel like there is always someone prettier there is always someone better looking.

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    • sorry for sounding kinda blunt, but please don't be that full of yourself to think that every guy who compliments you is trying to hit on you.

    • but that's how it is @Other_Tommy_Wiseau ofc disregard the family and close friends who always say positive things about you. Some guys don't just compliment a girl easily without a reason.

    • Yeah, but it comes down to who you're actually comparing yourself to, ya know

  • Girls dont feel pretty because of humans, society, US. we give a definition of pretty. red hair green eyes, blonde hair blue eyes, busty, curvy, nice ass. not many people compliment girls just to compliment them and when they do, its for an ulterior motive-i. e. to get in her pants. nto many women find themselves attractive and when they do they are REALLY cocky or society-us-- makes them feel shitty for a girl knowing she's pretty. i hate my looks from years of bullying, harrassment and neglect/abuse from my father. i believe im being told lies when im complimented but i am trying to believe im pretty. thats difficult to do and when a woman does, she is shut down. i think everyone is beautiful until proven ugly via their personality an actions.

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  • Ok i ll speak for me but im sure many girls r same as me.
    When a guy compliments me i say thanks it makes me feel beautiful at the moment , i personally dont wear makeup much , sometimes i see other girls and YES some r prettier , Sexier and more attractive even if they use makeup but at least they can make themeselves beautiful i feel sometimes that i lack a lot i have no problem with my weight i just want my breast to grow bigger a bit lol i dont think it will make me satisfied cuz we women We can't be satisfied because there will always be someone more beautiful
    I wouldn't say im unhappy though
    Im happy about how i look now ^^
    Maybe a girl is envying me fir smth i have? While i envy her for smth she has? But we can't get everything and can't be perfect i think :)

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  • Darling, I'm a goddess. There is nothing wrong with my self-esteem.

    Perhaps you just like the low self-esteem ones and attract them so you think that there are more of them.

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  • Because beauty has become the main measure of a woman's value in this society, horribly enough, so women are always trying for more and more (and fighting aging, weight gain, etc.). I want to be attractive but I don't think of beauty in the sense many women have been trained to.

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  • If a guy compliments me I think he is just lying & trying to be nice to me. It's societies fault that a lot of girls don't like how they looks. And other people who say mean things to people makes them feel worse about themselves

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    • why would someone lie to you about that? people are more likely to ignore you than give you a compliment out of the blue. i feel like it's more your fault (sorry for the bluntness) for not taking a compliment for what it is than saying it's societys (aka, everyone elses) fault.

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    • alright. all i'm saying is that if someone compliments you, 90% of the time, they mean it. and if you think that theyre lying to you or just saying it for some ulterior motive, all i can say is good luck. it's not a great way to live your life for yourself and for others. obviously it makes you cynical and skeptiptical. but if you constantly undersell yourself where basic compliments are "a lie", people won't want to be around you because it's pessimistic and most people dont like being around people who can't have fun. not saying this to condemn you or lecture you because im far from perfect, but i'm just telling you that it's pretty much a cycle. don't expect people to treat you "better" if you won't allow people to treat you better.

    • @Other_Tommy_Wiseau I just have tough time believing people. Since I'm not complimented much, and when I am it's when they want me to do their homework. People don't really treat me that well in real life, so I don't expect to be treated well

  • Im not saying all girls do this but i believe a lot of them do, say they are fat, ugly, have too much acne, when they want attention. Being attractive shouldn't be the main focus for anyone. If you're trying to find a boyfriend or get into a relationship they should be intrigued by your personality and other character qualities not how you look. When you find who you are and accept that great things that make you, you. Then you will believe you are beautiful. Many girls don't reach that phase until they are older, if ever.

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  • ohhh yes makeup is very helpful
    s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/.../...6af2e839db.jpg
    blame society girls are constantly criticized.

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  • (laughing)
    I model part time so enough said.

    a1. I am OVA my looks being discussed and dissected despite peoples sincerity
    a2. My inner mood/s will always determine my self confidence
    a3. I have extreme highs and extreme lows, just like every other human being

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  • I've just grown to accept myself as I am and do whatever I can to simply enhance my looks: makeup, exercise, fashion. But I can't help but feel intimidated by other girls sometimes, especially if I'm being compared. It's just how girls are and we're (sadly) not going to change so..

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  • Well it can be a lot of reasons, some are taught from an early age that their looks are the most important thing about them so they obsess over their looks. just in general women are very scrutinized about their apperence, so it makes them self conscious, even when nothings really wrong with them.

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  • Personally, as a guy especially everyone feels entitled to say their opinions of me. I'm said to be hot, cute, or beautiful often by guys. However, girls call me these things too (few lesbians like me). I don't get asked out so I question the validity of the comments.

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  • Because we compare ourselves to other girls, even those who are photoshopped or not real. If you look at models, game characters, art characters, etc., you will see that most of them have narrow waists, Long legs, huge boobs, gorgeous faces and hair, and plump round asses. Everything - media, video games, art - tells us that's what all men like, and you're only considered attractive if you look like that. 99% of girls don't.

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  • Bc people always points at my flaws

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  • I'm generally pretty happy and secure in my looks. If someone compliments me, I say "Oh thanks, that's sweet" or something like that, I don't argue and express a ton of insecurity. I like the way I look, I feel pretty and beautiful, and I know not everyone will agree since we all have different tastes, and there are millions of women who are more beautiful (I admire that and good on them), but that is all honestly okay with me. I'm confident in who I am, I know I'm enough, and that's what matters ;)

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  • Because according to society and *cough cough* the media, if you don't look like a fu***** model then you're not good enough

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  • I think it is because they arnt the prettiest person ever and there are really good looking girls out there who they want to look like but they dont and most girls as a child had a Barbie or something like it so they dreamed of looking like that when they got older but because they disn't end up looking like that they are unhappy that's what my friends said once but I don't know cause I had a gi Joe as a child and I don't care what I look like so yea hope this was somewhat helpful

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  • There is always going to be someone better. Beauty is also subjective, it varies person to person. I personally don't really care any more if others think I'm pretty or ugly. I know my self worth.

    But I have seen wome be super self critical. They will ask for my opinion, I say they look beautiful (because to me, they do look so) and their response is always something criticizing themselves ("My hair has a kink in it, it's not straight right here", "When I sit down, my stomach bunches up... I'm so fat" etc.) Like... what? I don't get it.

    They need the base line, a foundation: love yourself. Sure there are ways to improve yourself, but people should do so in a positive way. When they want to improve but it comes from self loathing, yeah they are going to be unhappy.

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  • It's not that I think guys are after something when they compliment me, but I assume they noticed that my self-esteem is shit so they were just trying to cheer me up or something. It's actually considered rude -not- to lie about an ugly/average girl being pretty, so... to me, all compliments are potentially false.

    I guess part of it is that we sort of learn that our value is in our looks. There is so much emphasis placed on that, even in very subtle, seemingly harmless ways, that many of us begin to associate our worth with our looks, which is extremely stressful and results in us being overly critical. We're always being told that one thing or another needs to be changed about our bodies and faces, told that we're not good enough, we pretty much only see beautiful women in the media (like in movies, normal men are a lot easier to find, whereas even "ugly" girls are usually still pretty), and our idea of what's "normal" gets slowly warped. So then we notice that we simply don't measure up, which is like feeling less valuable, and... yeah. Just a theory.

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  • Yes some girls really can feel that unhappy not all the time but if they think of it even ought it can come randomly. Even by just looking at another woman/female/girl.
    Why? Because we don't catch a break.
    For the longest, women had to be put together, elegant, thin, "attractive", their hair their make up exc.
    A girl can have amazing confedence but all it takes is one bad day, and one bad comment and something can bother her for days.
    For example she may not be the skin nest the prettiest, she may have scars birthmarks stretch marks. And all of that is her and reality is she can have that but also have the best smile, bright eyes or ample breasts.
    But none of that is forever she will age. The same guys for guys
    They will age things will sag. But men, except for a few acceptions, don't have to put make up, they are not judged or pressured or urged to cover their pimple their scars do their eyebrows have soft lips hair exc. Your not urges as much to shave to pluck hairs to have and do what most girls do.
    This starts from the youngest ages.
    But unfortunately some girls can feel horrible about their looks and it takes the right person of a certain amount of strength for her to feel okay and good about herself.
    I used to go crazy about my looks sometimes I still do. But there are days where I am now confident and happy enough to say
    Hey I don't need makeup. None at all. My hair doesn't not need to be pinned perfect. It can have a curl that doesn't belong. That pimple? I don't have to cover it. Just let it be and it'll go away evenually. Those stretch marks? My boyfriend calls them tiger strips. I will have them one day anyway as a after scar of the great kids I have and yeah one day my breast will sag.
    This doesn't mean I let myself go. It just means that I'm comfortable enough to go natural.
    Some girls never feel this or can do it.
    Society urges beauty of both genders but mostly females. And sadly it's easier to because we grow up watching mom do it and grandma still putting on her red lipstick even though they are wrinkled or none at all. We grown up and usually meet or come across that one guy who has the nerve to call us fat. Ugly or disgusting because we are not ideal to him.
    This is why most girl or some girls are not happy with their looks if it's not their wieght it's their skin if not that it's the shoes or clothes or makeup it's a never ending story

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What Guys Said 7

  • Girls develop these attitudes when they are quite young. The input which they have at that age is usually from other girls. What young girls know is this: if a girl is confident in her beauty, other girls will treat her badly. If a girl expresses a lack of self-confidence, other girls will like her.

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  • I wouldn't say it's THAT difficult for them to look unattractive.

    I WOULD say that 70% of the girls I've known are 6's or higher. And I have pretty high standards according to my friends. So 70% of girls are good looking.

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  • Ya I like confident girls that aren't boastful necessarily but are aware of their style and have some degree of inner security. Basically know that they have self-worth.

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  • I don't think it's like that

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  • Competition.

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  • 1. true on GAG because they aren't pretty, not really true in real life regardless of how good looking they are
    2. because guys get bored easily

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  • The woman's self esteem is a fragile thing.

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