It seems like many women these days are refusing men sex and demanding that they wait until marriage for sex.
'Make him wait'
Has become cliched dating advice for women because they think the man will not respect her or think she is too easy or something if she has sex too early.
However, it rarely occurs to women that some men may feel inadequate because they are not as sexually experienced and they do not want to feel small in comparison to their long-term partner - the person they fall in love with.
I am a virgin and I expect my partner to be a virgin.
18% (24)26% (25)21% (49)Vote
I would never want to be less experienced than my long-term partner.
8% (11)11% (11)10% (22)Vote
I would not mind being less experienced than my long-term partner as long as I was not a virgin.
12% (16)9% (9)11% (25)Vote
It would not matter if I was a virgin: I still would not mind being less experienced than my long-term partner but only if they did not sleep around much.
29% (39)21% (21)26% (60)Vote
My long-term partner's sexual history does not matter: they can have had sex as much as they want prior to meeting me.
Bandit74: 'Personally id prefer a girl who has a similar number of partners. I know I won't get a virgin, but I dont want to settle down with a girl and have her be my first and only while Im one of like 8 other guys who she's hooked up with.'
'Partner for life' is actually a better way of phrasing the question.
I wouldn't feel "resentful" towards a girl that has more sexual partners than me, but if that number goes overboard then my attraction/feelings towards her will only go down a notch.
Luckily for all of us, there's nothing hidden between heaven and earth, so you'll find out who you are dating. And as soon as I find out I'm dating someone who had several "sexual flings" then I'm out, cause I don't go around sleeping with girls and our view of sex is not the same.
Voted D, if she dated other guys, and was involved in relationships before me, cool. Messing around and casual sex/night stands don't go with me though.
I don't have a problem with a guy's sexual history as long as he didn't sleep around. That is a turn off to me. I didn't take care of who I shared my body with only to end up with someone who didn't care. That's not OK for me :)
I am not a virgin. But I don't have too many partners. I've had 2 bfs. So I want a partner similar amount. I would highly prefer him not to be a virgin because I don't want bad sex. And I'm too lazy to teach someone. I don't get the whole virgin obsession. But I guess for guys it doesn't matter if she's a dead fish, he'll probably still cum.
But I don't want a guy who's been around the block either. I prefer anywhere from 1-5 partners. But I guess if he was amazing, I'd give a virgin or guy with 5+(but no more than 15) a chance.
I chose D. If he slept around a lot, that's unattractive. If he had a large number of girlfriends, that's a warning flag as well.
But it DOES make sense for women to wait before sleeping with a man if she's thinking about actually dating him. Many guys want to fuck within the first few dates and that's how a lot of "players" squeeze in: they pretend to like the girl, get in her pants, and then ditch. The woman can protect herself by utilizing the 3 month rule if she chooses: she'd be able to weed out PLENTY of men only wanting to have sex with her and nothing serious that way.
Sure, she may also miss out on a guy who wanted a relationship as well. But I would think a lot of guys would be respectful of the woman and her wishes to wait if they wanted her and if she wanted to wait.
I'm not a virgin. I gave my virginity to the guy I fell in love with/ saw a future with (but not under the false impression that because we had sex, we were getting married). My partner had been with 4 women before me. It bugged me a little at first, but he told me that he regretted most of them, & since there's nothin he can to do take it back, I let it go. I was also in hopes that maybe, just maybe, we'd be eachother's last. Anyway, because I am no longer a virgin, I don't expect my future partner to be one. But I really believe that sexual history, the number, and the partner's heart matters. If he was wild and slept with a bunch of women just because, I'm not into that. If he's slept with a few women who were girl friends/meant a lot to him, I can accept that. I don't believe in having sex with someone you don't love, and I'd like my partner to feel the same, whatever his number of past partners are
If I had sex with someone who like had sex with a bunch of people, because someone said it to me like this one time, I feel like I've had sex with all those people as well. A friend of mine got pregnant by a guy who has 3 other kids and she said that his other kid's mother was dirty. And I just went, "Well if she's dirty and he had sex with her that makes him dirty and you had sex with him which makes you dirty. So you can't really talk about her." Point of the matter is I'd rather be in the same range as my partner because I just feel like I'm having sex with everyone he's had sex with and he's having sex with everyone I've had sex with.
if I knew about it I'd be completely turned off. that's why I don't ask. it's more important to know he's clean.
I understand that people like sex. It's a pleasurable thing. I would make him wait awhile before we did anything just to be sure I wasn't the next conquest, but definitely not till marriage (unless that happened fairly fast)
I admit that sometimes I get jealous-- not resentful-- of my boyfriend for his greater sexual experience. I was a virgin before meeting him, but he had been with three other girls before me. Part of me wishes I had a larger sexual history too.
Well I wouldn't say I'd resent him but I'd prefer a partner with a reasonably low "head count". Someone who values sex as something special. That being said, it's not a huge deal to me unless he was hypocrite about it
So I voted A but none really apply to me. Too many ifs in your options
I am a virgin and while I'd strongly prefer one due to my preference for shared religious beliefs, which includes that premarital sex is morally abhorrent. However, if he has slept with a few people (people he was seriously involved with-- I could never date someone who sees sex as something you can casually do) I could deal with that. I would feel insecure about it but I am a naturally insecure person in the first place so I could get past it. It's not that i'm being judgmental, it's just that I need someone who values it in the same way I do. I would not say I expect one however, I just have a strong preference for it. It's fair as I plan to wait until marriage, and it does not deal with forcing him to respect me.
Frankly, my partner's sexual history (prior to me) is no more my business, than mine is theirs. That being said, you and your partner should be in the same page when it comes to sexuality, in respects to one another.
they could sleep around prior to me i wouldn't care that's their business and it happened before me. but if it was honestly a lot i would ask to be tested if we weren't gonna use condoms
I can tell my boyfriend is a bit upset that I've gotten to like 3rd base with other guys before we lost our virginities to each other. I think I'd be upset too if it were flipped. I wouldn't like it at all if the guy had been with a lot of girls and basically slept around whenever he could. I would think he wasn't very respectful and that I didn't matter much, and that he probably only saw me as another notch in his belt before getting to know me better and that he could easily move on from me.
Girls have this mentality where" If a guy is hot but NOT relationship material then Ill have sex right away since they dont care if he respect them. However when the meet a who is relationship material by their standards they will make him wait for sex so he doesn't think she's easy.
Usually the guy who the girl dates has a lower partner count than the guys she hooked up with. Furthermore, he often has a lower partner count than she does, but she will lie.
Guys who have the traits that are conventionally desirable for relationships won't get as many offers for casual sex so they will typically have lower partner counts.
Personally id prefer a girl who has a similar number of partners. I know I won't get a virgin, but I dont want to settle down with a girl and have her be my first and only while Im one of like 8 other guys who she's hooked up with.
I don't mind if she has a few more sexual partners, but if she has a lot more, then no. It's not because she has a bigger number than me, but I don't like girls who go around sleeping with random guys every weekend, they're not relationship material. I'm not a virgin so I don't expect another virgin. I'm not inexperienced either, so I don't expect a woman with a very low number, but I don't want a woman with a very high one.
I never understand any person that wants to discuss sexual history. it has no bearing on your relationship at all. I rather not be with a virgin (when I as young). but if a woman tried a "make him wait" then she will do it with another guy. Sex is a very important part of an adult relationship. Waiting til marriage is irresponsible and stupid.
Most guys have a problem being with a girl with an extensive sexual history not because of feelings of inadequacy but because they fear she won't be loyal. If she has a reputation for drinking, partying and hooking up then how does the guy know she stay that way when they're dating? Women I'm sure have similar concerns when dating someone who's a known womanizer so it's not exactly a gender specific question. Most guys wouldn't have a problem fucking a girl who's known for being a slut, if it was an issue regarding their sexual prowess compared to her other partners then they wouldn't even do that. It all boils down to loyalty and a guy wouldn't want to enter into a relationship with a girl when he's worried she won't stay faithful.
I don't know my thing is i hate the idea of of her saying i was with 15 different guys before i meet ya but i can't really hold it against her I haven't been around the block but that's because in high school i was kinda against being a man whore and using women. I had 2 of the hottest girls in my school like me but i didn't feel anything towards them. But 2 ansr your question around my age an accountable amount of partners is 5-7, the only reason I don't say more is because if you have more than that you are just trying to use sex 2 cope with life and that will rub off on our relationship
I'm a virgin and my girlfriend is a virgin too and that's the only girl I'd date. It'd hurt me a lot to have a girl that wouldn't be a virgin because I just have problems with overthinking and I'd do that every single time. If I wouldn't know tho and I'd already love her, I would keep her in case she's not a slut. Sluts don't deserve anyone to love them and they should stay alone when they've chosen that way. (sorry for bad grammar)
I voted A but it's not really true that I expect her to be a virgin, at least I isn't expect many women to be virgins on purpose in today's society at my age.
I just wouldn't want her to be a hoe. It's fine if she's had like 4 boyfriends or so and had sex, whatever, they were in a committed relationship. If she was engaging in casual sex though, she most likely doesn't value meaningful sex though and is probably less likely to commit. That's what worries me about a girl that has a lot of casual partners, that and veneral disease of course.
it depends on their age. if she started having sex at 14 or 15 i would be very concerned. if she started at 18 or 19, is now 25, and has had 5-6 partners i am okay with that. i have had 7 partners since age 20.
Never done it before myself, but the virgin part isn't so terribly important. I was raised in a no-sex-before-marraige environment, but my personal philosophy is no-sex-before-love, and I'd want to be with someone who has a similar outlook.
I don't mind if a woman my age has around 5-7 partners, if she's had more than that I would consider her a slut and would not enter a relationship with her. I have had one sexual partner and I don't care if she is more experienced than me.
Depends. With my first girlfriend we were both virgin. My second we never talked about it. My third literally rubbed it in my face and told me details about her sexual past one night... I left her right after that...