Boyfriend with low testosterone? Happily married people please help?

Stuck in front of my boyfriend about an issue we've been having for about 7 months. We've only been together for 7 months in during this entire time we haven't had much sex. Mainly because my boyfriend doesn't really desire sex. I am 30 and he is 39 years old. We have sex about once every two months. In the beginning we were in a rush to be intimate so we waited about a month to have sex. I found it very respectful that he wanted to wait not knowing that he had any issues with sex. But after we became boyfriend and girlfriend I soon found out that he didn't have much of a sex drive. I tried coming on to him and got turned down every single time. I suggested that he see a doctor. It took him about 3 months to finally make an appointment. Keep in mind that my boyfriend is an unemployed psychologist. He is having trouble finding work. So in addition to being on him for a low sex drive I've also been on him about being unemployed and snoring. He also has sleep apnea which keeps me from being able to sleep next to him. I've discuss all of these things in the beginning telling him to go see a doctor. He finally see the doctor or three months later and they tell him that he has sleep apnea and low testosterone. A few months go by and I & I continuously bring it up. I finally give him an ultimatum on taking care of his problem or I would break up him. He finally orders testosterone injections and they will arrive next week. I just got off the phone talking to my boyfriend about the situation and he is very upset with me saying that I have been too harsh on him about the sex issue. I don't see it that way. I see it as I have been very patient with him taking into consideration that I've waited 7 months for this day. My boyfriend says that he has been doing things during the 7 months. He says that he first stopped taking his medication to see if that would change the sex drive. That he was slowly making changes to solve the problem. What do I do? Happily marri


What Guys Said 2

  • There is something more important here than just sex. This problem reveals his attitude about relationships: how much does he give and how much does he get. If you ignore everything that he has said, and you focus solely on how he has treated you, what do his actions show about his feelings towards you?

    Relationships are about give and take, and they do not always feel 50/50, but what you are describing seems to be rather lopsided.

    • Why lopsided? What exactly makes it that way. I don't see it.

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    • Why wouldn't treatment work for low testosterone? Viagra and etc won't work?

    • Testosterone may work, but it is not guaranteed to correct the problem and there are some significant side effects. Viagra is useful if he wants to have sex and has ED, but it won't create the desire in him.

  • U have every right to want to be pleased in a relationship and if he isn't satisfying u then he needs to take steps to solve the problem. Perhaps he has a bad sexual experience or has some serious sex drive issues. I wouldn't blame u if u broke up with him.


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