Do guys really like "the chase"?

Do guys lose interest if they feel like they don't have to work or "be the man" in order to win a girl's heart? Can girls make it too easy for a guy sometimes and by doing so stave him off?

Updates:
I'm asking because a friend suggested I back off from "pursuing" a guy to let him "be the man"... as in, if I text him last then I should wait for him to initiate instead of me always contacting him first. But I think the guy in question has low confidence and may need some encouragement.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • No lol. I don't chase women. Every time I've ever gotten with a women it was because she made her self obviously available for me. That's when I make my move. If I catch her slipping and playing head games I'm usually out at that point. I think it's a matter of moderation though as with everything in life.

    If a girl is texting you day and night then you might think that you are too good for her or she is desperate. At the same time if a girl is stone cold distant I would lose interest because I would much more fun with a girl who IS interested in me. So aim for that line in between.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • All of the guys I've talked to hate the chase. If you play hard to get, it'll backfire 99% of the time. Don't do it.

    The only ones who would lose interest for "being easy" are players who aren't interested in you to begin with.

    There's nothing wrong with contacting first, I always contact first and I have had a very easy time getting a boyfriend.

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What Guys Said 23

  • Well I am not actually sure, but in my opinion not all men like to chase, pursue a woman or want to work very hard to win a woman's heart, so not all men like the chase. If the woman is too hard to get or is rather playing too hard to get then there is a good chance that men will lose interest in that woman.

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  • It really depends on the guy.

    A lot of guys lack confidence, and even if they really like a girl, they lack the courage to approach a girl and the experience to do a good job at it, so often, nothing comes of that mutual attraction.

    A guy who is more of an "alpha male" may absolutely enjoy the chase, and wouldn't be as interested in girls trying to take the lead.

    You really have to know a bit about the guy in question.

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  • I think the word "Chase" is so often wrongly used. It should be replaced with "to have" or in some cases "to have more".

    I don't like the chase. I like "to have" the girl. If she starts with that chase thing I just go find another girl. Because that chasing time could have been spent on doing nice things together.

    I hear girls say things like if he stops chasing he doesn't like her enough but in reality it's because of the needless chasing he had to do he doesn't like her anymore. This is what I mean with "to have".

    I also mentioned "to have more" but that is for the guys that can't stay with one girl.

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  • me chasing a girl is too much work but a girl whos just in it for the sex isn't interesting at all. I dont mind though a girl looking for the relationship and the cuddling but does have a feisty side.

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  • At first, but I'll stop and assess and if it isn't worth my valuable resources I'll hit the brakes real quick

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  • Guys who really "need" the chase is not the kind of guys you want to be with, they are likely had chased plenty of girls already and didn't care too much if an girl don't want them. For me it isn't really about the chase, but about getting an decent girl and not an slutty girl, and most of the time it's the slutty girls who are much more easy, for obvious reasons.

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  • I enjoy chase, but she should leave a clear trail for me, and always show interest, it's like a forepl

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    • It's like a foreplay for a relationship, a part of game of love. It depends on how much guy desire you, that is what decides will he like a chase or not.

  • This is true.. maybe not for all guys.. but sometimes I have felt if I didn't have to work a bit then I didn't feel it was worth anything at all.. unless of course you fall in love then that's something completely different. But yes the Chase is exciting for men

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  • No just the opposite if ur too hard to get we're gonna take it as ur not interested and cut our losses and go to the next girl.

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  • I don't really like the chase. I don't like games. If I have to jump through hoops, initiate all contact, and try to guess her I treat level. I will loose interest.

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  • Sometimes not always

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  • Hecck nawwww, I hate cardio.

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  • Im usaully straight up with the girl i like you , wanna go on a date. If she says anything else but a yes i move on my time is worth something and i dont have time 2 play games. Maybe why im single but its cool with me :)

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  • No, guys hate the chase.

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  • No, I don't like "the chase" at all.

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  • Nopenopenopenopenope

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  • No, the adventure of a relationship is supposed to start when you become a couple, not end.

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  • nooooooooooo

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  • If a girl doesn't show interest and/or attainability, I find a different woman to pursue. Dating is fun -- pursuing is NOT. Don't play games.

    As for your update -- if he's the bashful sort, you probably need to be more proactive. Contact him.

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  • The only guys who like the chase are players, who consider it a game, and like a challenge to conquer. They expect to win and enjoy the satisfaction. Obviously the girl is just a checkmark to them.

    Guys who are not players hate the chase.

    A lot of female dating advice is around how to keep attention of high-status guys who tend to be players. But it doesn't apply to most men.

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  • I don't play games. If a woman plays hard to get, I move on. Either you like someone and want to be around them, or you don't. Plain and simple.

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  • Pussy hounds enjoy "the chase"... and the next "chase", and the next...

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    • I'm not saying to just give it up to just anyone or anything like that, im just saying don't play games.

  • I'd say most guys lose interest because the girl is "too hard." Honestly if a girl likes me why would she enjoy watching me struggle so hard to get her affection. She would be upfront with me from the start. To make a guy do unnecessary things just means you don't respect him and I want a girl who will respect me because I'd respect them.

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    • This guy said everything i wanted just didn't know the words 2 say it ,

What Girls Said 6

  • I don't like it!

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  • Has the guy shown any interest in you?

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  • If that's the case, he is probably not worth your time.

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  • Most guys I know say they don't

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  • I don't know, and I don't even give a shit anymore, all this is so stupid.

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  • Guys like girls who do not play childish games like deliberately ignoring a guy when you are available to text them back.

    They do not like psycho bitches, clingy or desperate women who are needy or possessive

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