Help! I am starting to become very obsessive?

I've been dating this guy and things are going great. We just recently decided to become exclusive and I love it. However, I feel like I am going crazy! For some reason I have become obsessed with talking to him and I look at all the things he's liked on social media, I get jealous if he likes another woman's photo (even if I KNOW she is married to someone and they are purely just friends). I have become really insecure and I don't know how to change it. I know it's not him because he makes me feel more beautiful than anyone ever has, but I guess I'm just afraid of losing him. I feel like if I keep getting upset over stupid things (i take jokes personally, get upset when he misses plans even if he had no control, ect) that I'm going to drive him away. He has been really understanding about all of this because he has said that he has gotten jealous too, but I don't expect him to keep just taking my bs and being fine with it. How can I change this? I don't want to feel so obsessed I don't want to ruin out relationship and it's taking a toll on my mental wellbeing.


Most Helpful Guy

  • My girlfriend who i've also not been dating for too long, often feels the same way to some extent I think. I can't speak for all guys, but I feel some of the same feelings for her, and totally understand. Because we are on a similar page with our anxiety, I can understand how she feels and am able to empathize, and not get annoyed. I really just look at it as a way of her showing how much she cares. Unfortunately, I can't speak for all guys, but that's at least how I am. If I were you, I would talk to your boyfriend about it and just completely open up. If it makes you uncomfortable, at least he'll know.



Most Helpful Girl

  • Add something to do so you won't miss him
    Example, I like cycling. So doing that will keep me busy


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What Guys Said 2

  • Well curve away from the female jealously cause it may end up embarrassing you.

    • I'm trying but it's difficult 😪

    • Show All
    • I understand all of this and that is why I'm trying to seek help. I really try not to do it but it's very difficult in certain situations. I dot. WANT to be jealous or clingy. I agree with everything you are saying but it's more so just scenarios and not really advice as to what would help me STOP doing these things. I know the consequences, now I need to find a way to stop being a crazy.

    • Well simply just stop and accept he's got female friends then

  • If you're obsessive, you will push him away. It's hard and I've been down that road because I was obsessive too. Just know that you're more likely to push him away if you're being obsessed, I think this is true anyway. You may feel anxious or paranoid about what he's doing, but just try and keep your mind of the things he's doing, I learned my lesson :)


What Girls Said 1

  • I know that feeling ahaah, im pretty jealous myself. So, i understand you but you will drive him crazy that way and you'll become crazy to control him and you could ruin your relationship. You need to learn to trust him. He choose from all woman you. So, you need to be happy and enjoy that relationship, and don't worry about other woman. :)