Im in a bind, with a woman I really care for I need some advice. should I keep this going?

I met my.. "friend" five months ago, we've been seeing each other ever since and i really care for her. Im currently on deployment in the middle east (bahrain a very wealthy area) and have five more months here. I've grown to really enjoy being with this woman but we both know my time here is limited at most, so we understand that the "relationship" will come to an end. If i'm not working im at her place night and day and we do everything a couple would, but without the label of in a relationship. when im with her friends im introduced as "my friend" and same goes with when she's with my friends, but we all know very well that isn't the case. she's from brazil and grew up in the Netherlands while i grew up in america and work sent me here, so i was very excited to meet a woman of some other country. We are very upfront with eachother and she told me a few months in after i told her about my timeline of leaving this country, that she doesn't want the emotional connection then see me leave (which i understand) a month in she told me she doesn't want this to get too serious because she would be leaving back to NL (Netherlands) in February and she has people she needs to see, like her ex that i know she still very much loves. im not the one to be jealous or angry but i know and see that they still talk quite a lot, and Skype a good amount... im very much a hopless romantic in a bind with how my military life is and to keep it somewhat short i know that when she goes to NL she will be with her ex for those few weeks... The time weve spent together should be that of two people in a relationship but still for the public is a "just friends" basis even though we "do" everything a couple would. i understand that i have just five more months here but i have to say I've loved every minute with her and want her to be happy in a new country she has moved to. i want her to be my girl but i just think im living in somebody elses shadow... i had to vent.


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What Girls Said 1

  • Just make it the best of your time, for both of you.
    Unless you can make an LDR work with the willingness to somehow get together again either through change of work or some sort of higher studies scholarship or whatever, you need to accept the fact that you'll need to part ways. As painful as it may be, once you accept that, make these five months memorable.

    Though it's not the same because you're in a relationship, I made the mistake of trying to distance myself from my friends when I had to shift countries. I should have focused on making it a more positive experience than trying to push people I care about away because I was moving away anyway. So just make it last while it lasts. :]
    Good luck.

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