Are many people like beautiful women and some successful guys just confident bcus they've never gone through... severe long-term abuse?

When I look at people, I've felt through the years how I am so unconfident and down and have a hard time raising my energy, pretending I'm OK. Infact I can't pretend - barely; I can barely go day to day.
I went through year of severe abuse and trauma in my family unit.
I'm not a bad looking guy though.

When I look at people - I feel they're so confident and I think I compare myself to them and feel shame. They're so confident. Even if there's shit they're going through - they're confident.

I was watching a model do all sorts of interveiws this morning on youtube - a really beautiful one, because I was curious what she was like. I looked at her pics and the way she talked and she seemed to carefree. She wasn't stupid at all but I couldn't tell if she was naive at all. She seemed... too confident then...

I thought eventually... could it be just that she's had a lot of nice experiences and I've had a lot of bad ones and that I'm not actually "lower" than her because she would be in the same position I am if she went through what I went through.

So... there's nothing really to be ashamed of?
Her life has just been completely different than mine!
If I were to go out on a date with her and she thought something was strange about me - it would just be that we're completely different?


Most Helpful Guy

  • The road to confidence is different for everyone. Some haven't had many bad experiences and that helps. Others have had to struggle to overcome and built confidence.


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What Guys Said 1

  • A lot of models are often secretly really insecure from having their appearance criticized on a daily basis, being pressured into nude shoots, being sexually harassed by photographers, and knowing their entire existence revolves around their looks which will eventually fade. Would you even give half of a fuck about that model if she was only average looking? Probably not right? Their job, the parties they get invited to, many of their friends, are only interested in them for their looks. This often weighs down on them.

    It's easy for them to appear confident in a short 4 min interview but that doesn't nessesarily represent how they really feel inside.

    With that being said there are probably models who are genuinely confident. Although like the other guy said, being confident doesn't mean you've never had hardships.

    • ... The model I was looking at was, it seems a genuinely very confident model. Seems to have a strong masculine father and complete family. The other models - although I'm not just talking about models, but anyone, are more insecure, hostile, prejudice - they make me more insecure; but I was only comparing myself this morning to this model named Sara Jean Underwood. The models just happen to be on the internet and have enough material that their mannerisms can be looked at closer.