My boyfriend is mad after having to pay $40 for my ticket?

So my boyfriend was supposed to be going to a music fest with just his married friend but the married friends wife decided to go for Sat so they my guy asked me to go that same day at brunch. He said to scalp one would be $150 based on the prior day but I knew it would be higher so I took an extra $100 in cash. all offers were around $300 and. I said I would get more cash but he said he had cash and we paid $290 to a scalper. I said I'll pay you back and a week later I paid for dinner as I often do.

He seemed to think this wasn't enough but didn't say. I make a good living but he makes twice as much and his ticket was FREE from his friend. He make six figures. These tickets are $500 for three days and I paid tons for one to be with him when I didn't want to go.

I pay more in our relationship but at home. I cook for us most nights. I have a backed Mac and cheese that costs $50 to make because gourmet cheese is expensive. I cook for his friends, I but nice clothes. I make him steak or seafood but he wants me to pay half he time when we eat out. I'm not cheap o don't argue about money but I hate him thinking I'm not carrying my weight. i spend $300 a week cooking for us. On his birthday I took him out and the bill was $500 after tip.

But it when we went to a cheaper place and I insisted on paying saying I still owed him $40 from the ticket he got mad. Why?

he doesn't have money problems and I pay way more than he does money wise and interval wise. He hates women that 'use him for money'. But while he isn't using me he takes advantage. He tells his friends I don't pay enough. I pay when it's my idea and expensive. If it's his idea with his friends I let him pay.

But it it has gotten so bad recently I did an itemized rundown on my own not taking to him of bills and I pay 2.5 as much as him. He pays for ubers, dying flowers, theatre tickets and sometimes drinks. I stick my house with his expensive beers, my wine and feed him cuisine food 4 nights. My grocery bill is over $1,000 per month for us. Why are men this way?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • All men are not this way, and you know that. It is easier for you to say that all men are this way than it is for you to ask yourself, "What should I do about this cheap bastard?" This is something about him that won't change. Are you prepared to accept living with someone like this for the rest of your life? If not, why are you spending time with him now?

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    • Well exactly. Money is ever an issue even with friends. We split bills, Someone picks it up or whatever. It is hurtful that he is like this. If we were poor then okay. But he seems to forget the hours and money he watches me spend to make him meals that sometimes cost over $100.

      I don't care about it until some $40 is a big deal to him. I paid three times the going price on a ticket to be with him so he didn't have to be alone with a couple. He is complaining about $40 he thought id repay. I just feel some guys think all women are out for money no matter how much that woman makes.

    • "I just feel some guys think all women are out for money no matter how much that woman makes." And some successful women think guys all want their money. Instead of focusing on what "all guys" or "most guys" want, focus on how you feel about this guy. It sounds like you are at a crossroads where you need to make a decision that will affect your future.

Most Helpful Girl

  • I think you both are just looking at it solely financially, I've never had a relationship where they would pay so close attention to how much things were and I think for you guys it's getting to a point where that's all you guys are focusing on and it's creating tension. You both are a team it really shouldn't be about whose pay more all though yes it would make sense he would be a tad more generous, however just communicate about it

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What Guys Said 4

  • Your boyfriend is a cheap douche. Most men are not.

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    • Yeah that's what's upsetting. I've dated so many guys that make less than me and I insist on paying a lot of the time. Especially if I picked the place but I'm not pushy about it. I just know it isn't easy for them. Meanwhile this guy is happy to let anyone pickup the bill. His friends aren't poor, I'm not poor bit that does excuse him from paying. He does insist on paying sometimes though. And I have dated men who never pay because they think I should afford it since I have more money. Both are bad.

      But yeah I wear size two pants, have a nice face and hair. I'm highly educated and a member of Mensa. He is smarter in a different way but thinks he is better than me often because in not an Engineer.

  • ""Why are men this way?""

    They aren't. But your boyfriend clearly is. You guys might need a budget.

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    • We don't need a budget. We both make six figures. It isn't about what one can afford. It is about what he thinks one should pay. He invited me, his ticket was given to him from a friend whose wife said she didn't want to go. The wife changed her mind and paid $350 for a scalper ticket. Meanwhile my boyfriend paid zero and had his friends wife's ticket that was given to him.

      I paid for mine as well other than the $40 he paid. He does this a lot. And it is annoying because he makes more than anyone. This is why I didn't directly give him the cash.

      I'd had it with him. And I'm not the type to keep score but friends take turns paying not just letting whoever offers to pay pay.

  • sounds like you guys need to have a talk.

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    • Nope I'm booting his ass.

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    • Based on what? He makes more, doesn't have kids or any obligations. I spend more in the relationship on is and put in more effort. He honestly does not give any. He has to go.

      If he cared about me I would feel differently but he doesn't.

    • Based on the fact that your not able to communicate and work through issues like this.

  • Don't know but you guys sound like big spenders and $40 seems insignificant with all the other things you pay for , kind of trivial of him to bring up

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    • It is trivial. Completely. But because of the way he was raised it makes him feel used. Meanwhile it leaves me thinking you paid a total of $40 to get into this fest while everyone else paid hundreds. He bought most of my drinks once inside.

      But yeah it's like seeing coworkers argue over who bought who more soda or something. It isn't something I want to be a part of.

      I've always been of the school that if I want someone to go with me somewhere I buy both tickets or discuss it ahead of time. When I wanted an ex to go visit friends they paid for their plane ticket but I paid for the hotel no splitting. If I want to see a ballet I pay for both our tickets. I don't say hey come to this concert with me that you don't like so I dont have to be alone but pay your way.

    • Thanks I finally realized how messed up this was. He only wanted me to come because the wife was coming then made me pay a crazy amount of money and got mad that he had to pay $40.

      I would never do this to someone. Especially since when I agreed to go he told me it would be no more than $150. If he cared he should have shared in the price more I think. I REALLY didn't want to go. I had been so many times. I went to be with him and meet his friends. I would have never made him pay for his ticket if the table was turned. It was his idea and expensive.

    • Yeah it does sound like it's off balance at times even though you both can afford it

What Girls Said 1

  • Because you let him be that way, honey. He's using you. You spoiled him and he is taking advantage of it. There's no way to retrain him now. You have to cut the cord.

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