So boy picks up girl for a date. Opens doors, takes her to a nice restaurant, pulls out her chair, the whole nine yards. Pays for the date and takes her home. What does he get out of it? She gets royal treatment and free food. What does he get?
Its pretty sad that not one person has one definitive thing that woman offer men that he can't just get from friends. I guess it's time to step up ladies.
I have no idea why this is still expected of men on dates. It's nice that you do it, but I for one would never let/expect a man pay for my whole date. Yeah, the odd treat is nice, but I like to do the same for him. For example, I will throw in a question like ''what is your favourite chocolate bar'' and turn up to the next date with the bar. Small things. So I can't really answer this properly because I pay for my own half.
If you really like the girl then you would be doing all that stuff without expecting to have anything back from her. You don't give someone something just to receive something back. That's not how a relationship works. You can't go into a relationship with someone whether it's a friendship or a romance with the attitude of, "I paid for dinner tonight, so what are you gonna give me in return?" You'd want to make the person feel special and treat them, then further down the line they will do something in return for you without suddenly feeling pressured to buy you something or give you something just because you did something nice for them. That's not the way a good deed works.
Lol I love that you include opening doors. Like opening a door for someone is a huge sacrifice that takes up your time and energy. :P And for the record, I think I've had my chair pulled out for me one time in my life (I was 14). It was weird; I didn't care for it.
Anyway, this is silly. If you're worried about spending too much money on dates, then don't go somewhere fancy. Heck, don't spend any money at all if you want. The last first date I had, we sat in Starbucks for a couple hours, then went back to my place and watched a movie. I always felt guilty having money spent on me for first dates. Now, of course, my boyfriend and I split the bill or occasionally treat each other. It's whatever.
But don't do nice things expecting to get something in return. That's not how it works. If you want to treat a pretty girl to a nice dinner, go for it. But don't do it if it's just gonna make you resentful.
No one says you have to be super old fashioned about it. And if you don't want to date women no one is forcing you to, you could just quit whining and not date at all, or maybe try dating other men. On my first date with my boyfriend I made it clear that I was paying for half because if you don't speak up about what you want no one is going to magically read your mind. I wasn't into the old fashioned set up so I let him know, and he was fine with it and that was that. All you have to do is communicate like an adult instead of blindly following archaic traditions you don't agree with and then complaining about it online. All you have to say is "Hey is it cool if we each pay half?" it's that easy!
Well i'd split the bill with the guy, i'm not going to let the poor guy pay for the whole thing. But i'd love it if he were a gentleman and opened the door for me and pulls out the chair. I mean I don't know, blame society but if he wasn't a gentleman I wouldn't be ass interested.
He gets to have someone who thinks of him as the perfect gentleman. Lol, it's only one sided though.. Women do this for men aswell.
My guy treats me like a princess, but in turn I treat him the best I can.. And I never ever expect anything from him. It never gets to be predictable, I continue to be blown away and amazed by every thoughtful thing he does.
Depending on how the date goes it could end with a kiss and a second date. Which could turn into a long term relationship which would probably turn sexual. Then all that could turn in to marriage and having a special person by your side till the end of your days.
I never liked dates totally like that. I meet the guy there in my own vehicle, if he opens doors for me that would be nice of him. I open doors for others as well. I pay for whatever I order, he pays for his. Then I like to walk around and get to him while we digest our food. We say goodbye, then I drive home and he drives to his home.
It's simple. Dates should be balanced and a time to get to know one another. That's how I view them.
He got 'accepted/she agreed to go out with him' and the chance, cause that's all it is, to see if the woman he asked out is one he wants to keep seeing. Having done all you listed he also probably got to talk about himself spinning whatever narrative, true or not, he wanted about himself and made himself seem the perfect gentleman who gave her 'the royal treatment'.
If he wasn't an idiot he also had a goodtime with a woman he was attracted/interested in getting to know.
well you know that it's not really that financial, you do not end up in a date to make some legitimate profit, you are trying to win the heart of the girl of your dreams. and whenever you are trying to win someone's heart, you do it with an open heart and generosity and treat your lady nicely. when you do something good without asking for return, you become a more good and confident person in your perspective and definitely in your partner's as well, which a girl will never understand if she hasn't done the same. also, if it's too much of money and treatment work for someone, they don't need to end up in restaurants all the time. they can just ask the girl to take a walk in the park or beach in the evening.
The girls are saying that his reward is her company but the woman is also getting his company so it's hardly a fair trade-off. Women expect more than they offer and they try to trivialize the things guys are expected to do. A girl might say a guy is being a whiner about having to spend 30 bucks on dinner, yet at the same time they are showing through their actions that they wouldn't be willing to pay half that amount. If it was no big deal, women in general would already be doing it and it would be a non-issue. This kind of bullshit is half the reason I'm done with dating.
It's funny because I was just talking to somebody about this and I said the same thing. For some reason, we live in a society where a woman gets treated like royalty. Women will fight for equality, but then go back to being a "woman" again when it is convenient. It disgusts me. You're either equal or you're not, you can't pick n choose when you're equal or not.
He better be getting his dick wet in one hole or another
Not sure what you're trying to prove here. All women and all men already know that the dating world is owned by women. Since we men are fine with it they don't need to give up the luxuries. If you want to change it then get all the men to agree. Why would women bargain for having less?