I mean, just look at me, I'm disgusting, I should've known my place, but didn't, I thought I was better than what I am, but I'm not, I truly am disgusting and lowly. She deserves something better than me, honestly. I'm nothing but some fucking black bastard, it's sickening, who would even think of touching me, I'd say it's like touching mud, but I'm mixed, so, my skin is a jaundiced yellow. I'm sorry for the hateful tone, I just hate this so much and hate my stupidity. I'm disgusting, and more than that, I'm pathetic, of course in thinking I could ever touch someone's milky skin, I was also delusional.
I doubt it ha anything to do with your race. We've all felt unrequited love at some point and it's painful but you will move on.
When I was 16 and 17, I used to have a huge crush on this kid. I even thought it was cute when he sneezed. Im 20 now and I barely even remember him. He wasn't a bad guy, but we weren't meant to be and he certainly wasn't worth all the time, thought, and energy I put into him.
It's ok to feel like shit about getting rejected. It happens! But I promise you will move on and it will be SO special when you find someone who likes you back.
Ever heard the saying love is a battlefield? You aren't alone in your sorrows :)
Dude, I never thought I'd say this to some randomer on the internet but I'm genuinely worried about you.
I happen to be "jaundiced yellow" like you and you are the only person viewing yourself this way, well, yourself and racists. I used to wish I was whiter when I was younger but not any more, so I kind of get what you're feeling. You feel that you just don't fit in. You're a black sheep, so to speak.
Honestly, nowadays, nobody cares about skin colour. Just as long as you're a nice person. Work on getting yourself better and I promise that white girls and even non-white girls alike will take more notice of you.
First and foremost, you need to sort out the racism. Yes, you are a racist. You believe that you are inherently inferior because of your race and that white girls are superior and therefore out of your league and you're wrong. I've talked to you before and you seem quite smart. You're not stupid.
The only thing pathetic and stupid about you is your racism.
Listen you need to tome that self hate down son enough people Will hate you for your skin colour that you own it to yourself and your oppressed ancestors to Hold yourself in the highest of regards there's billions of white girls your a sexy Beastie
Just find a white girl who's down for the dark meat and not so girl who "doesn't find black guys attractive" they're are plenty out there there's nothing white skin can do that black skin can't except burn in the sun
There are people in this world you will never satisfy. That's a fact. Whether it be your looks, your ideologies, or even your favorite sports team, people are going to reject you... And it's NOT personal.
You're making it extremely personal, when in fact it wasn't. She doesn't even know you. She rejected your outward appearance due to her internal prejudices, whether race-based or not.
You're placing so much value in your outward appearance and have slashed and burned your merits from the inside, which is why you can't handle rejection. That's the worst strategy for managing anyone's psyche.
Internalize your value, because you can control that. Build yourself up from within, and outside forces will mean nothing. That signals confidence to a woman, and plenty of confident men get fucked.
Mate skin colour should never set a boundary of what you can achieve. You still think and bleed like any other race, people may try to put you down but it's up too you to prove them wrong! We are all human at the end of the day
Rejection sucks but you need to be a man and accept it, I have been rejected more times than I can care to remember and yes it stings, yes it hurts and yes it does batter one's confidence and it can erode someone's self esteem but the difference between men and boys is men get back on the saddle and boys whine and become self-deprecating people and this is where you fall.
She probably didn't reject you for being black (and if she did, she's not worth your time) because black men are the most popular, just look at how many women on here who go crazy for black guys and will state they prefer them over white men or Asian men. Your problem is you hate yourself and well not many women will want to be someone like that. You need to change how think and your results will probably change too.