What prevents a guy from asking a girl out?

I mean, if you like the girl, why not ask her out? You'll never know whether she likes you or not (since we're secretive and confusing creatures) unless you try, right?
Yea, I know it sucks being rejected...
What other reasons stop you from asking your crush out?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I don't think it's us stopping us from asking our "crush" out. It's the woman and their body language that tells us, "Steer clear, you will fail". Balls or no balls, guys can "sometimes" pick up the "I'm not interested in you in that way" from women (we like). So we just end up pining or make eye contact, but won't approach lol

    To the ladies, if you're interested in "that" guy (looking your way), HELP THE GUY OUT! Sometimes guys will feel like they're not good enough for you, no clue how to start a conversation, or break the ice will make us shy away or panty out. Your demeanor can also intimidate the guy... so SMILE if you're interested... smiling back seems like a small thing, but a smile can boost and motivate the guy to approach you.

    Trust me even the most confident-type of guys can get nervous around the person they like and scared to proceed to that next step if they're unsure that the woman they're interested likes them back in that way. We don't want to put our necks out there and be labeled as "Creepy" by you guys if you reject us... so flirt back.

    If smiling doesn't work, but you know the guy likes you from a friend of a friend of a friend of that guy you like, take the reigns and ask him out yourself. Don't wait for him to approach and ask you first. He may just be the "shy" type.

    -Based on experience: I used to like this girl back in high school, but I waited for so long that another guy snatched her from me. I consider myself outspoken and confident kid back then and can talk to just about anyone, except that one girl... I can't even structure a proper sentence and end up stuttering when I tried. Years later, I found out from one of her best friends that she used to have a crush on me too. If I had known, I would have had the courage to ask her out myself, but she threw no bread crumbs. Get the picture?

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    • Wow. Thanks for this!

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    • Thanks Bumble for being my first.

    • My pleasure!

Most Helpful Girl

What Guys Said 35

  • The problem is there are a lot of women out there that are so nasty, evil and mean when they reject a man. You would not believe how bad they are. Men often get labeled a creep just for saying hi to a girl as well. The list goes on and on. This makes men scared to approach any woman because he does not know if this will happen or if it will go well. This is why it is important for women to let men know they are open to the idea of being talked to. The successful women let men know "Hey, you can talk to me, I want to be talked to and it is safe to approach me.

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  • Rejection. Not only that, but really personal rejections. Not just a "no" but "no" with a lot of cruelty thrown in. What's worse is when it's public.

    Normal rejection stinks. But if so many girls seem to LOVE going for a personal attack, I have no interest in being humiliated or told exactly why she'd never want to be seen in public with me.

    I'm also a bit realistic. I don't see the point in asking out a woman that has never shown any sign of interest. Do I KNOW there's no interest? No. But I can guess pretty well when there are signs that there's no interest.

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  • "What other reasons stop you from asking your crush out?"
    I have no crushes, but what prevents me from asking out someone I'm interested in is the likelihood of causing discomfort or be a nuisance to said person.
    I'm not even worried about any rejection in general, except perhaps if it were a female friend I'd get feelings for and said rejection would likely come with losing a friend because it'd be too awkward for her.

    Plenty of women make it abundantly clear they find it annoying to be asked out or approached romantically without "clear" signs on her end. I'd rather not be yet another nuisance like that, so I'll wait for actual clear signs (or for her to approach me and ask me out).

    If that means likely missing out on any and all chances I had, have, and will have in the future, so be it. Knowing I didn't end up bothering people for selfish reasons is something I find more important for my own peace of mind.
    A pity, but it is what it is.

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    • Interesting perspective..

    • It's not the most efficient or beneficial way of approaching things when solely looking at the potential for personal gains, but it works for me. It helps that dating and such are not my main focus, I wouldn't advice people who desperately want to date to approach it like I do - especially at this severity.

  • ""You'll never know whether she likes you or not (since we're secretive and confusing creatures) unless you try, right?""

    No, if she's interested, then you can tell.

    If you can't tell, then she is clearly not interested enough to show enough enthusiasm to seem interested.

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  • well rejection is the main thing most people fear, other reasons could be that they're currently too busy in life?

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  • For me it was asking out women that I knew were beyond my reach... after all what kind of girl would go out with a guy who is kind hearted, has a respectable job and loves animals?

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  • Three things prevent a guy from asking a girl out

    1) himself
    2) the girl
    3) life

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  • are seroisuly suggesting we go around asking every girl out? trust me it doesn't work most girls who give attention are either taken or will be a bitch about it

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  • Well, I'm just going to ask a random woman out.
    But the thing that sometimes prevents me from asking a woman out that I am interested in is my social anxiety. I always think to myself "I'm going to f*** something up" or "she's too pretty, she probably has a line of guys waiting to ask her out".

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    • Sorry, I meant I am NOT going to ask a random woman out ***

    • I'm also used to think that also... plus if the woman is attractive I would assume she has a boyfriend or if she's single she has line of guys to ask her out... that is why I never ask a woman out except if I'm really sure she's interested in me

  • I think it's usually the fear of rejection that prevents people from asking someone out

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  • >you'll never know whether she likes you or not

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  • When the guy received lots of rejection or there's an another guy hitting on her who is better than him and he'll think he's not good enough for her... But there are a lot of girls feel better when they reject guys for ego boost

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  • Well now it's different. I have asked girls out, then they accept the date. Then the day before the date they cancel everything. So yeah...

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  • Do Hollywood actors count? LOL!!!

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    • AH NO!!!

    • Screw that other shit... wrong post

      Anyways, shyness and assumption prevents a guy from asking a girl out. You dont like me, you already have a boyfriend.

  • The fear of rejection.

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  • You just think that it is that simple "why not ask her out?"
    You don't know what it's like to be rejected

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  • because girls like to keep you in the friend zone and if he not sure if u like him like that why risk loosing u by asking u out besides im sure he's putting out signals and if she hasn't picked up on them and asked him out then why should he

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    • I been crushing on my homies x for a while now they been done and dusted for years now but we stayed cool for like 6 years while i was in arelationship now that I'm single I can't stop thinking about her but I know she don't feel me like that we both got a no dating friends x policy but every time I see her I want to hold her... I'm of cked up should I say hey I'm tired of looking for some one like u when ur right here ur one in a million and I know I'm the one for u... Lol she gonna laugh and say u like my big bro stop playing

    • Come on... you can't be so sure about that. People might surprise you.. I like to think there's always hope.

  • Right now. Her ex and distance.

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  • Age matters for her...

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  • Maybe I am not interested in a relationship lol.

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  • If she's ugly lol

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    • lmfao!! I don't think you read the question correctly. She was asking why men are afraid of asking a woman, that they (men) are attracted to, out on a date (apart from having no balls or fear of rejection)?

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    • Which men? I hit them up if I find em hot lol

    • lol bro, nevermind on which men. Ya answered her question with that follow-up 😂

  • Awkwardness if she says no

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  • Its not the rejection that scares me, it's how far you can actually take it, is what frightens me.

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  • Being a pussy, mainly.

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  • i dont like risk.

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  • For me it's looks I feel inferior like she easily could find a better looking guy then me

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  • Let me ask you this, what if the tables switched and you liked a guy, why can't you ask him out? Don't always think because historical gender roles say Guys have to ask the girl out every time, that's not necessarily true, since times have changed, if you like a guy, you can ask him out. He shouldn't HAVE to ask a girl out.

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    • What does this have to do with my question?
      Yes, okay, I have the same opinion as you when it comes to what u were referring to but I just asked a simple question to know the reasons why wouldn't he ask his crush out.

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    • About the fact that there are many kind and nice girls out there who don't have to be considered "just friends"
      You just sounded like the those silly girls who say "I date d-bags and leave the nice guys in the friendzone".
      I'm certain what you said isn't true because of my experience with the girls I know.

    • I mean some are I date d bags, but not all I honestly believe none of them even bother to give a chance.

  • What stops a girl from asking a guy out?

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    • I don't know about the others but for me, for instance, I never had luck in guys and relationships. Whenever I have a crush on someone, they never feel the same way (at least most of the time... and so I don't wanna risk ruining our friendship

    • Dude when in doubt whip it out (metaphorically)

  • Women are too hard to read and don't know what they want no matter what and it isn't worth it wasting the time trying to figure them out. And therefor less and less women are getting asked out.

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