I'm 43 and been talking to this guy who's 44 for 5 months. He told me from the very beginning that he was not wanting a relationship because he's just getting out of a bad 14 year marriage. Well, I was fine with that and we went out on several dates. We became sexually active. In these 5 months I have developed feelings for him and last Tuesday I told him. He told me again that he didn't want a relationship and that he was just looking to make friends and meet new people. The conversation ended okay and I graciously accepted his answer. Later the next day I messaged him and told him that although I would not lie and say I didn't mean what I told him, I was sorry for putting him on the spot. He responded and told me that he was glad I understood and that this was why we could be friends. The very next day he asked me out on a date. I was a little shocked because I figured that since I told him how I felt, we could be friends, texting buddies, etc, but he wouldn't want to see me knowing I had feelings. I agreed to see him thinking he must feel SOMETHING for me even if he wasn't quite ready to admit it to himself yet. We went out and he spent hours cuddling with me and holding me. This was after sex, so I knew it wasn't just a prelude to sex or his way of buttering me up to have sex. I spent the night and the next day he made a comment about how he knew I wanted to be the only girl and that he knew I was jealous of other women. When I left, he told me he would text me and I haven't heard a word from him since, it's been 2 days. I never would have thought he'd do me this way. I don't know if he wanted sex with me one last time after what I told him and he's done or if he's needing space or what. Part of me wants to go to his house and confront him. Another wonders if I should send him a FB message for my own sense of closure. If he is done, it hurts to know that I didn't even deserve the dignity and respect of a goodbye. Please give me some advice. I'm hurting so bad.&a
Help! Should I Confront Him and if so How?
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He is feeling guilty and can't continue on with you knowing it is simply going to hurt you. To his credit he didn't lie to you and I know you weren't expecting to develop feelings but you unfortunately have and for someone who isn't going to be able to reciprocate them for you or anyone. It has nothing to do with you he just doesn't have an open heart anymore.
You just need to move on. If you really think it will help you with closure to message him on FB then great do it whatever but then block him. Don't wait for a response because nothing he can say matters. This issue is dead in the water.0
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