I was in a very abusive relationship (sexually, physically and emotionally) for 2 years and I managed to get out 2 years ago, but since then I have been trying to move on, taking a break and concentrating on myself mainly... I have also been trying to date, but unfortunatelly all the guys that I have met have been complete jerks to me and have always been out on dates with me hoping to get laid... Now, I have a really high sex drive as a woman, I dress quite sexy and provocative, I am a quite socail person and I have massive breasts for my tiny frame and a lot of guys find me hot... although i am quite sweet and innocent and always believe in whatever bullshit... So, I always end up going on a date with some pretty handsome guy, he would take me out for dinner or drinks to a nice place and if I find him attractive i might end up sleeping with him... Now, I know its wrong of me to have sex on the first date, but none of the guys have stayed and they all seem to just get laid with me and then disappear... I know I make myself an easy target for them, but why none of them ever came back? Of course, some of them came back for more sex and always say how amazing I am in bed and that they want more sex, but they all come back for the wrong reasons... I am only 22 and I am embarssed to admit that I have had only one relationship in my life and slept with 20 guys... and only 1 out of the 20 guys wanted to date me... and thats my psycho ex boyfriend... It makes me increibly sad and sometimes I feel like there's something wrong with me... but even if i dont sleep with them they would still ask for sex and they would still disappear, so even if I tone it down a little bit, i would still get the same jerks and the same responses...
Most Helpful Guy
I find that in many situations like yours, it is the girl who chooses to accept men that are abusive. This is not a blame game. Abusive men exist everywhere, and so do caring nurturing men. The difference is that you probably only find the abusive ones attractive. Perhaps because you see their arrogance and outgoingness as confidence, while a nurturing male is more passive and you overlook them or don't even notice them at all.
If you have a high sex drive, and dress sexy and provocative, you're unlikely to attract a nurturing guy because he's probably not going to be at parties and clubs where you hang out. If the "good" guys are there, they are probably going to be the quiet ones along the side, rather than the loud obnoxious dude in the middle of the room that's grinding all the girls and hitting on every woman that passes by.
It is these obnoxious men that are going to hit on you all the time, because quite frankly, they're there to lure a woman for sex. Nothing more. The problem is, there's a lot of girls who take the bait and it results in a dead-end relationship where the girls is nothing more than a sperm receptacle until the guy finds a younger, hotter girl or when he feels bored with you.
The sexy provocatively dressed girl (you) is not the type of girl we men want to settle down with and bring home to meet our parents. And at your youthful age, guys who are of similar age are looking more for sex, and less for a meaningful relationship.
If you want to find someone decent, I'd say avoid the clubs, bars, snapchat, plenty of fish, tinder... etc. You may find a good guy there, but you'll probably have to sleep with another 100 douchebags to find that one decent person.2
Most Helpful Girl
It's because you let them do that to you. Girl, your body is a precious jewel, and it is bound to be sacred. A jewel is found deep under the ground and only the right and patient person who really wants to be with you will dig deep enough just to get you.
But see this, if something is above the ground, easy to see, easy to get, it'll be easy to lose, too. Why not, says the guys, I didn't lose anything to get it.
I know you're feeling lonely, but always remember that in the end, you'll have to back yourself up, and you'll realize that the only person you need is yourself.
Now pick up the pieces, honey, and get up. The world awaits your best version.0