Can patience be something you learn over time? Or will the person be impatient forever?

My boyfriend is extremely impatient. He wants instant results for everything he does. His impatience also leads to anger as well. Not physical anger. But he does get pissed and yell over little things that don't show instant results. Or when people don't give him instant gratification for something he's done then he gets angry as well. I've actually known a lot of people like this but all of those other people don't care to get help for it. My boyfriend often gets irritated by the attitude he has and has recently come to me asking me for my help to turn himself around. I'm not quite sure I'm capable of such a thing. I'm very patient and always have been. So I'm not sure what techniques to give h advice on or anything along those lines. Some people have told me its nearly impossible to get over impatientness. They've also told me that the only thing that may help is meditation or learning when to walk away from situations that make you hot under the collar. I want to help him but as I said, I don't know how. My patience just comes naturally. Any tips or advice any of you can give me that I can relay back to him? Thank you!


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Have him read "How to Win Friends and Influence People" by Dale Carnegie. It doesn't address patience directly, but it will help him interact with people better. It's a quick and easy read, and if he's serious about getting better it'll help for sure

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    • Alright, cool! Thank you!!

Most Helpful Girl

  • Like with any bad habit or trait, the first step to overcoming is to acknowledge and accept it. Sounds like he's already reached this point, but now he has to TRULY want to change if it's going to get better. Just saying so won't help. He has to want that change for himself, first and foremost. The next time he behaves impatiently, call him out on it. Don't sugar coat it, either. Maybe suggest that he clear his head by walking it off or distracting himself with a sport or activity (jumping jacks, shoot some hoops, etc.) Ultimately, it's not up to you for this change to take place, but you can be sportive and help him through it when it occurs. He also needs to recognize that at this point in life, it will most likely always be a challenge for him. But it can get easier over time if he continues to practice patience with whatever helps him calm down. And don't let it cause you extra stress in the process, either.

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What Guys Said 2

  • Patience can definitely be learned! Almost all kids are impatient, but not all kids are impatient.

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    • Any tricks or pointers you can give me? My boyfriend is a "do-it-yourselfer" (so to speak). So since he has came to me and actually built up the courage to ask for my help, I feel like I must do this for him. I need to help him. Afterall, if he wasn't in need of help or completely fed up then he wouldn't ask for my help at all.

  • Yeah its possible, it would take time, and.. patience (BAM)

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What Girls Said 0

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