Man in Military: Will this make me seem like "that girl"? Can't tell if he's busy or not interested (please read details)?

Hi all,
My friend's cousin is in the marines and was home on leave for a week over the summer. I ended up liking him a LOT so decided to message him on fb. We ended up hitting it off! Constant texts, consistant flirty and joking, for 2 months. My friend was talking to him one night about me and I made it seem like I was expecting something serious immediately which I'm not. I actually like the distance and casualness of it because I'm focusing on school and getting a job right now but loved just being able to talk to him. Well after he talked to her, he messaged me thinking I was looking for something serious. He said he really likes me and is interested in me but wants to focus on himself right now and understood if I met someone here. I was fine with the casualness I told him, but the other part made me confused like does he want me to stop talking to him, etc? He said he loved talking to me but again, was focused on himself. (As a note: the way we talked seemed like bf/gf). We talked for another 2 weeks after that as if there was no talk.

Things started to die down and eventually 2mos go by and I hadn't heard from him at all. The last time I talked to him he called me after work for a hour and we just had a casual phone call with a bunch of laughs so nothing serious or anything.

He's back home now, but now he's headed to VA for Marine OCS and he's been training for weeks to prepare. Understanding this, I get how he can be busy and why thats lead to a decrease in convo. I haven't talked to him while he's home and he doesn't even have time to see his cousin before he leaves.

Being100% accepting a casual, phone relationship only, is it okay to message him after not having spoken for 2 months? I like that we have our goals that we're working on, but i really liked talking to him and want to stay in touch. I'm afraid texting out of the blue makes me seem like the girl whocant move on? Do you think hed enjoy to hear from me or do you think


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What Girls Said 1

  • I was in a relationship with a marine as well. And basically I know exactly how you feel. My problem was that I fell for someone who just wanted a "summer fling" but I didn't know this until he left to the middle east, and our conversations started to die. Of course he was much busier than before, and I totaly understood that, and I texted him once a week, on snapchat beacuse he had no phone signal. And he would just read my snaps and ignore it. Then I asked him why, and he told me he had no time for me (but he was able to open the message)
    Lol so I didn't believe it for a second. But anyhow... I did the mistake of texting him again about two months later. Lol the irony. And got no response from him. Let him text you first, to see if this guy really cares about you. And remember that the military has strict rules and regulations. But he should have time to contact you if he really wants to contact you. I learned the hard way.