Can you love someone who does not love themselves?

My boyfriend is very stressed. With college, work, and a mother that treats him like shit. He is starting to lose his faith in his own abilities and even admitted he does not love himself. He loves me dearly and I love him too and try to remind him how great he is.

So can i love someone who dosent love himself? Should I?

comment why.

  • Yes
    77% (46)76% (34)76% (80)Vote
  • No
    23% (14)24% (11)24% (25)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

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Most Helpful Guy

  • I have respect for you for staying by his side.
    I was down in a hole mentally for the first 6 months after my father's death, and I now realize how draining I was negatively on the energy of those close to me.

    You can definitely love him, though also you need to be aware that your needs have to be met too. If his issues start rubbing off on you, definitely re-consider your position. Also he needs to take steps to help himself. If he is not improving, you don't want to be in the same position years down the track.

    Harsh advice, but from what I went through myself, honest

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Most Helpful Girl

  • The thing is you can physically love someone, because you can see all the wonderful things they don't but they can't love you the same back if they don't love themselves. things like this never work it always causes issues. people shouldn't enter relationships when they have demons with their own lives. both parties should enter a partnership because they've both built great lives and now they wanna share it.

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    • If you don't love yourself you can still love other people. I don't see how those two are connected at all. You can still love every single thing about someone else and want to be with them all the time and at the same time not love yourself. I've been there. I can tell you it is possible and it can work out.

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    • Certainly it's not healthy for the relationship and it'll be better if you love yourself. But that doesn't mean you can't love other people when you are feeling hurt about yourself. You can still feel love and compassion. It's not an excuse to act like a dick to people. There have been so many times where I've heard people that are depressed and hate themselves act like total jerks and blame it on depression. Bothers me.

    • @Mekkalyn I know right, there is no reason for people to take their issues out on other people ae. specially when it's yourself you're angry at but like my mum said, you can't always yell at yourself. lol like i said it's a tricky one, people can make it work but can cause complications. each person to their own though. :)

What Guys Said 7

  • i think you can love them for sure but i think it is hard if not impossible for them to truly love you and be in a healthy productive relationship.

    a person has to believe they are deserving of love to be in a relationship and to believe you deserve to be loved you have to love yourself

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  • Only you can answer that. You probably want to ask yourself if you have it in you to love someone that doesn't love themself.

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  • Yes, it's possible but it will start taking an emotional toll on you with time.

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  • Ya make them feel good about them self

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  • yes, but they can not love you =P

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  • You can but it will likely lead to heartache.

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  • When I first met my girlfriend I didn't know it but she hated herself and cut and was suicidal, but I eventually helped her love herself, and when she was better she told me that she used to cut and stuff. I think it's better because if you help him/her then your bond will be stronger and they will love you in a greater depth.

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What Girls Said 2

  • Technically you can, the stresses of them not being able to appreciate themselves as much as you do and constantly down on themselves can a downfall in the relationship, solely because you will feel your words are starting to become useless, after repeating and repeating.

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  • I couldn't do that. I would have no interest in being with someone that doesn't love themselves. I think that they would be rather annoyed or resentful towards me eventually - I don't make any secret that I am in love with myself.

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