- YesVote A
- NoVote B
Most Helpful Guy
I don't know, I think it would be case to case. It's nothing against the girl's situation, it's just that I never plan on having kids of my own, so what is my role going to be? The age of the kid would matter too. Are we talking an infant or a 16 year old who can probably largely fend for themselves?
I mean, if I were to find myself single now, at my age, I'd have to go in knowing that many women in my age range are going to have kids, that's just the facts. I think I could be in a situation where there was still a father in the picture and I wasn't expected to come in and eventually play a father role. Or maybe I could, who knows? I don't hate kids at all, I just don't like having a lot of responsibilities and obligations, and being a parent is just about the biggest responsibility and obligation to take on. Plus I'm not good at taking a backseat to others, not so much like i'd throw a fit about it, but in my mind there would a buildup of silent resentment, even though I totally get why her kids would always come first before me. And I get very irritated when I'm held back from doing what I want because of another's needs or wants, again, whether it's for good reason or not. I can totally understand the rationale behind situations and still hate the way the situation affects me. I was an only child, so I'm used to my way or the highway. That's a huge part of the reason I don't want and know I shouldn't have kids, I'm ultimately selfish and totally comfortable with being that way, but I see that it doesn't make for a good parent, so I'd never be so blindly selfish to the point where I'd have a kid that I wouldn't totally sell out for, or more accurately, would sell out for but would harbor inner resentment.
So those are all things I'd have to consider and take a hard look in the mirror about what my expectations and commitment levels would be. If I really really liked a girl, I could possibly see myself going through with it, but again, I think it would have to be a favorable situation where the father was still a strong presence and I'd just be expected to be the cool boyfriend that the kid's don't hate, but I wouldn't be responsible for their upbringing beyond normal adult-to-child "hey, don't do that, it's dangerous" stuff. It would all be situational I guess, and the issues are more about me than her and her kid (s).0
Most Helpful Girl
No, not at this moment of my life at least.1