How would I go on a date with a feminist?

Soon i'm going on a date with a feminist. I don't know how many things she would get offended by. Would holding a door or paying make a feminist mad? She isn't really radical when it comes to feminism. Any other suggestions would help.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Feminist here :P I personally wouldn't be offended by you holding open a door for me. It's polite. I'd do the same for you if I got to the door first, y'know? It's just the way common decency works, so that's not a bad thing at all. I wouldn't be cool with you paying the whole bill, I'd at least make sure I paid for drinks or some aspect of the date, but obviously she might think differently.

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What Girls Said 7

  • Just be yourself and do what's natural. If she gets offended by basic courtesy or good intentions (having a door held open for her), then that's ridiculous and she's probably not right for you.

    If you want to pay for the date, then you could plan on doing so - she'll speak up if she wants to pay for her own. Again, if she gets offended, then that's ridiculous.

    Differently feminists believe in different things, so it's hard to give you a more straight forward answer. You could search "feminism" on YouTube and check out different points of view.

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  • Guys... I really find it so disturbing and annoying that people want to label others as "feminist" as if it's some big deal. It is not...
    This just means one simple thing, she sees men and women as being equal and wants to be appreciated as such. One does not appreciate sexist jokes (on men or women), undermining the other gender or doing anything that makes the other one feel like less because of being a specified gender.

    It is not rocket science. There is a difference between this and having manners. Holding a door for someone is manners. If she doesn't appreciate it, fine... then you don't do it. but there is no need to act like it is some big deal. Men and women need to stop that stigma around it. Just be yourself and if she doesn't like who you are, then you both are probably not meant to be. Have fun on your date and enjoy!

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  • How about you act normal like a normal human being?

    Just don't make sexist jokes. The end.

    Go have fun.

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  • No we find that stuff sweet. She will probably try to pay at least her share or offer. We really don't get offended about much to the point of being rude. We just want equality between the genders

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  • If she isn't radical then just treat her like anyone.. but keep clear of sexist comments ofc

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  • Just don't act like she is beneath you. Don't give her any benefits. Don't try to be old fashions romantic, just be modern day sexy. DO NOT HOLD THE DOOR OPEN FOR HER, that's a classic. Expect she can do a lot if she can't she will not ask for help so if you see her struggling help her but not to obviously.

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  • Feminists are all about gender equality. Feminazis are selfish af. What you're going a date with is someone with more equality 'n' respect. Just treat her in any way that she presents herself. And you'll be set.

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What Guys Said 9

  • holding a door shouldn't offend her. it's never offended a feminist girl i've dated, or the one i married. that is just an act of kindness that can be extended to women and men.

    i think you just want to avoid things, conversations or notions that suggest women are beholden to act in certain roles due to their gender. Or anything that suggest women are inferior to men based purely on gender

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  • Just agree with everything she says.

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  • Easy, don't date her. She will never fully be committed to you as divorce will ALWAYS be a possibility for her even if she claims to love you.

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  • Wear a cup!

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  • Let her take the lead, allow her to steer the conversation. Just be polite, and keep eye contact.

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  • You just be yourself.

    If she doesn't like you for who you are, then she's not worth it. You don't change yourself.

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  • Step 1. DON'T

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  • Treat it like a normal date

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  • It's been two days and no word about how the date went. I'm guessing she murdered him...

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