Why a single man doesn't want to marry the woman she loves?


Most Helpful Guy

  • Because he loves her and the present state of the situation?

    Marriage isn't necessarily the best way to cement a passionate and fun relationship. Society tends to view it like the ultimate act of love, when it should really be like the ultimate act of something else -- some practical need like children, a desire to share the same income and get a tax reduction, etc.

    It usually means a change in the type of friends you have, and potentially a lot more time spent with other married couples, family, etc.

    Marriage changes everything. At least from the male perspective, it's the end of a lot of freedom, like the freedom to just have your own spending money and do whatever with it (go bar hopping with friends, e. g.). It's the end of a carefree lifestyle.

    And that can strain everything -- and possibly even distance the husband and wife apart, make them no longer feel so passionately about each other even if they still love each other.

    A man who loves spending time with a woman on his own terms, and of having the energy to act spontaneously on a date, while simultaneously spending a lot of time with bachelor friends and so forth could easily ruin that whole dynamic with marriage. It's not the wisest choice for two love birds who are really having a lot of fun.

    It's a good choice for two people who want to settle down, decide they've had enough youthful fun for their lifetime, and can just start focusing on their career, family, etc.

    • A good reason to get married is like, "We're getting old enough to stop partying and having so much fun. We want to have children and purchase a new house and live together and focus on our career." That would be a good reason. A horrible reason is like, "We're so passionately in love, we should cement our love for each other in writing!"

    • What if he is rich and money is not problem. And he can hang out with his friends after marriage too.

    • It's a little bit complicated. I thought the same when I got married, but something changes. I think it's just the fact that my income is supporting someone else. It got me to focus on working harder. That said, I wasn't incredibly wealthy (software engineer -- decent but not rich). Maybe a rich person could more easily just keep things as they are, though living together is also quite a change in lifestyle (if the two people aren't living together already prior to marriage). In any case, there are a lot of legit reasons to hold off on marriage even if you love someone with all of your heart.

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