I'm a Christian and I'm dating an agnostic. Should I continue the relationship or not?

So I met this guy at my church back in October. We started hanging out and we had developed a very good friendship. After a couple of weeks he had asked me out and I had said yes and this had really excited him because he had never had a girlfriend before and I hadn't either. At first I had just assumed that he was a Christian since he went to church but it had turned out that his parents were making him and he told me he was an agnostic. At first, I kind of just looked at it as I could be the one to help teach him about Christ, but I wasn't going to force it. Now he hates whenever I talk about God and it really upsets me. He is very happy now and doing better in school and he sees me as his savior as if I'm Jesus myself. I've been praying about this and I just don't know if I should continue the relationship or not because I care about him very much.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • The issue isn't his belief, its yours. You want him to change, which he isn't. if I remember correctly jesus specificly told the apostles (after his resurection) to not go to the babylonians, to not go to the sumarians but to those who have lost their way. Basicly its not a christians job to force people to believe, its to help people. You want him to believe as you do and refuse to except him as is, but doesn't that go against your own faith? Isn't it your job to simply be their for him? To help not to judge not to force? Thats the issue. agnostic means without knowledge ie he is not rejecting god nor is he accepting him he simply acknowledges that he knows nothing when it comes to god. Its not your job to teach him and in fact that will cause greater conflict. Let me put it this way I am assuming that you know of the story of the good sumaritan? As you know the priest and levite pass the wounded man by but the samaritan stops to help. Well this is a story about helping but why would he specify a samaritan? The jewish people and the samaritans had always been at odds with eachother and in fact the jewish people hated them. Yet he specifcly used a lowly samaritan, why? My thinking is to show that despite the fact that he was of a different culture, despite being of a different religion, he acted in a way that was moraly right, not just in the eyes of man but in the eyes of God more so then in fact the fellow jews who passed the wounded man by. Basicly he was worthy of recognition because his actions not his words. The priest and the levite where jewish in words, the samaritan was jewish in action ergo it didn't matter that he believed in the jewish God or not what mattered is that he acted in a way tha God approved of, that God wished for. So what I am trying to say is it is not your place to demand your boyfriend believe as you believe, what matters is what his actions say. Are his actions of a good man? Then he is doing precisely what he is suppose to, so the problem lies with you and your inability to except the fact that the only aspect of what a good christian is suppose to be that he is not is outright believing that God exists. Who cares if he doesn't believe as long as he is a good person and does his best to continue to be a good person? Jesus didn't abandon those who didn't believe and in fact continued to love them, not because he thought they would come around, but just because. Something to think about.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I've been in this situation before. It didn't go the way I'd hoped.

    If his feelings are so strong that he actually hates any mention of Christ from you, then I don't think he'll be open to receiving Him. And I'll tell you something else.. When I dated an agnostic, be also told me that I was saving him and he needed people like me in his life. It was complete bull. He only said that stuff to manipulate me. He was a "bad boy" and he knew exactly what to say to make me sorry for him. I later learned he was only after sex from me. Thankfully, he never got it. Maybe your situation is different, but it's just something to keep in mind.

    You just need to look hard at this boy, look hard at yourself, and decide if it's worth it. And keep praying - God might just give you your answer. Good luck!

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What Guys Said 15

  • if you like quoting scripture, and talking about God, if you really enjoy doing those things, and he absolutely cannot stand it, then you two are not compatible. you know what to do.

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  • It's your decision. I think that if you respect his point of view and he respects yours and you just avoid talking about it, then it can work. If you are not happy with it though, if you want a Christian like you by your side, then it's better not to continue.

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  • Y'all are unequally yoked and this union will only cause you both pain because your very spirits are in disagreement and the spiritual part of a relationship is very important.. simply cuz u had too ask/question your guys relationship is not good.. agnostics are responsible for the book of Enoch and all its wild claims that are no longer apart of the bible.. tell him if he's not going to become a christian and be saved then you respect that and you will have too move on and continue your most important relationship with GOD!!!

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  • I'm atheist and honestly I wouldn't want to date a religious person because I find all religions kinda ridiculous and for me it would drive a wedge between us. But I'm not him so I can't speak for him but that's my opinion :) I hope it all gets sorted out :)

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  • Id say not to give up on him, and instead of talking about God with him, just be His light to him.. Light casts out darkness, and when he's ready to ask you about Jesus, he will. But it will not happen if forced.

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  • It depends on what type of Agnostic he is. I'm agnostic and still want to raise my kids religious because I think it played a big part in who I am today. Most come off bitter about religion in my opinion. One thing you can't do is force him to belie in something he doesn't

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  • Dating outside of your religion is a viewpoint on life that varies from person to person, my mom married outside her religion twice. So really it depends on how you feel nobody else can answer that for you. Also since your asking the question if your looking for a future wife at the moment than get out now.

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  • you could but the closer to God you get the furgther you'll feel from your guy.

    its hard but its upto you

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  • I would say not, Christian and agnosticism really doesn't mix well. I recommend you find somebody your more compatible with.

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  • You're not compatible. He'll just resent you trying to convert him to your religion.

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  • Sure. Why not?

    You could take turning the other cheek to a whole new level.

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  • Hey thats up to you.

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  • You two aren't compatible. I'd suggest you move on.

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  • If he's acting that way when you talk about God and the bible with him then he's not the type you'd want to go out with, especially if religion is very important to you. The bible says that we shouldn't be getting involved with those who are unbelievers.

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  • if you dont see him truly and actively turning in christianity leave. the thing will not go well.

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What Girls Said 10

  • Here's my thoughts... I think a lot of times people (not pointing fingers at you) tend to push the issue about God, and bring it up like a batte to be won... and I honestly think that the best thing to do is just be an example. Be Christ like and let him see and find God through you. Be a light and let him come to you. Leave him be, continue to pray, and be an example.

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  • The Bible says you are to be equally yoked, this is not to put more rules on you but to protect you. If you can't talk about a personal relationship with God to someone you're dating then it will only drag you down. Someone who doesn't have a personal relationship with Jesus can't know you fully, because you are of the spirit and he is of the world. I had the same problem as you and waiting only makes it worse. You are not his savior, I now it's easy to feel guilty or whatever but you have to remember that's God's job not yours. Praying for him is the best you can do. I know it's hard, but you doing what God is telling you to do is the best option. It took me breaking up with my boyfriend to figure this out. Now as I look back on it I know it was for the best.

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  • It's a swim or sink situation and you can hardly teach someone how to swim if you haven't mastered the act yourself - you are more likely, in that event, to be dragged down to the bottom of pool or ocean whichever applies. If I were you, I will keep my distance! At 18, you should focus on which uni you need to be getting into!

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  • Well if his parents are Christian maybe he lost faith... Probably why he gets mad when you mention GOD.

    I'd ask and try to find out why because I'm sure something happened. Pray for a sign but don't develop the relationship unless you want constant fights

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  • Ugh. If you don't want to date someone who doesn't want to talk about God and you do, then don't date him. He clearly doesn't like it. So don't try to make it seem like he's changing because he has a Christian in his life. Doubt that's the case. If you truly respected that he's not a Christian then there would be nothing to complain about. If you do then carry on

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  • You are forcing him to take in something he does not absorb. It is not going to work out.

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  • End it, it's easier to pull someone down than lift someone up

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  • I can see this being a conflict in the near future. you cannot change someone if they don't' want to be changed. if religion is very important for you and not important for him, maybe you need to find someone else with your same interests. it's already starting to upset you that he doesn't agree with you. i'm sorry but move on.

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  • Well I'm dating a Muslim and I'm Catholic. It's hard, but if you really love one another, you'll work through your religious differences and it'll all work out. Good luck!

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  • That's your personal opinion. If you care that much about and he you then there isn't a problem. He hasn't dissed your faith or bashed you personally? Nobody is perfect and if you remember that Jesus never hung out with people who were perfect (he was and is the only perfect). He would want you to love as he has loved you despite your imperfections.

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