I had 3 nice dates with a guy I met online.
He calls and text me often, suggests nice date ideas, but never pays.
Yesterday he asked if I wanted to go to the restaurant, I said yes, then when the bill arrived we split the check. Then we went to the movies and he paid for both because the cashier gave him 2 tickets. I paid for the popcorn and drinks because I felt like he did not want to pay for both tickets and I felt bad.
It's not like he is poor he is an engineer in a big firm, drives an expensive car and still lives with his parents who are rich.
Later that night he asked me if I was ok in my budget for the activities we do. ( so he made it clear he wants to split all the time ).
I really feel like he doesn't want to pay because he doesn't like me enough. Like I'm not good enough so he doesn't need to impress me.
What do you think?
Thanks for opinions,
Most Helpful Guy
Since he seems like an educated type, he might be doing this out of the principle of equality as a forward thinker.
I won't call you a hypocrite since you might still believe in more traditional values like woman as house wife, having kids, etc., which might go hand-in-hand with the idea that men should show how much they care for a woman out of their wallet.
Things get awkward in the transitions towards this kind of futuristic society, where women still aren't always being treated fairly when it comes to employment, where you have some guys like this who might believe very strongly in taking action sooner towards equality, etc.
But we can't fight these trends or else we get stuck in the awkward grey zone.
I'm still kind of traditional and maybe even slightly sexist/chauvinistic, so I tend to pay for women. I'm kind of weak in that way: I put my desire for a nice female bum above social principles.
Yet this is probably exactly the type of men we need in the future for a more equal society. I have a lot of admiration for him.4
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Most Helpful Girl
Personally I automatically pay for myself every date at least until we get serious. Official. I think it's a waste of money if it goes no where with that person. But I do feel once you become a true couple you should take turns paying.
I use to barely make any money when I started dating my now husband. We went on 6 dates and I realized I can't keep affording these places he wants to go. So I started making excuses for not being able to go out with him. He makes a lot of money as well. Because of that I was uncomfortable telling him I can't afford to date him. He also came off as the party loud have a big night out type of guy. We stopped talking but months later we ran into each other and he asked if I wanted to go over his place for dinner. I said yes because I wouldn't have to pay. Lol He started catching on after that and our dates were more low-key. Until we got serious then he never let me pay. Just because he's not paying right now doesn't mean he doesn't like you a lot. Try getting to know each other without costly dates.0