My boyfriend won't take me out?

When we first started dating we both admitted we were complete hopeless romantics who are huge saps for cheezy/cute dates. It's been about 9 months and we hav't had one date. Not one. Not even going to the zoo or going out to dinner. I have no idea how to ask him that I'd like to have surprise dates without it sounding like I'm forcing him to.

To clarify, I have taken him out and I really enjoy making him romantic at-home dinners as often as possible. He was in the Army for 5 out of the 9 months we've been dating, so of course I'm not talking about those 5 months.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Try taking him on some dates if you can. Then he might reciprocate. Or just say "hey, we should start going on some cute dates every once and awhile. It'd be fun. Whatcha think?" Then take it from there.


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What Guys Said 5

  • Guys do not get hints. Just tell him.

  • I would not read a heck of a lot into that as a lot of guys are not as forthcoming at wanting to do things like maybe the women is.. unless it is sex.. to me it seems all guys can't wait for that part and are quick to point that part out.. I am not one of those types of guys, I do not mean to sound rude at all and hope it is not viewed that way.. but it may be time to get another boyfriend or even a date that will pay attention to you and do things that you like.

    Such as going to a movie.. going for dinner.. or something on those lines.. there are lots of guys besides the ones I stated above.. that will be there for you at the drop of a hat and it has nothing to do with sex.. this guy sounds like he is not interested what so ever what in what you want to do... take care now and I hope all works out for you

  • Why don't you take him out? I mean, you say you're "romantic" right, so why not take him out? Oh, or is it that you only wanna receive romance and not give?

    I would understand if you would have taken him out but he never take you out, but you haven't taken him out, how are you gonna complain about HIM, when YOU don't do it either?

    • Oh no no no, I do take him out. I've made him romantic at-home dinners too.

    • Show All
    • I've read my question over and I understand where you got confused, I really didn't word that right.

    • It's ok.
      Is he selfish on other aspects of his life? Does he do other romantic things? Does he have the money to take you out?
      You said he was in the army for 5 months, did something happened that may have changed him?
      Does he feel like he's apathetic?

      Since we're just assuming, there are many possibilities that may cause this, but the best thing is for you to tell him that you enjoy going out once in a while, even if it's not something expensive, just him taking you out to dates.

  • i saw down below u said he was in the army for a big chunk of that time just go hang out with him and mention hey we should go get something to eat or something go out casually and work ur way up and he was in the army so he might be stressed and tire it takes a lot out of u he might just need time

  • Your dating a little boy not a man.


What Girls Said 2

  • Thats sucks is he really busy?

    • I should've mentioned this... He was in the Army for 5 out of those 9 months and got back right before Christmas. But since he got back he's been searching for a job and isn't in school, so he's not all to busy.

    • Oh but he looking for a job. Yeah he must be tired and stress. Maybe he need to relax but you should ask him whats up!

  • Are you sure you're his gf? How many people know you're together?

    • I mean it's on his Facebook, we went to each others family Christmas parties, and everyone kept telling us we look like a cute couple waaayyy before we actually started dating, I'm positive.

    • did he ask you to be his girlfriend?