Have you ever lowered your dating standards? What should I do?

I'm 22 years old, never had a boyfriend, never kissed a boy (on the mouth or cheek). In highschool, I was super busy studying all the time and didn't even go to prom. I like to think I am decent looking but most of the guys in my college are fuckboys, frat boys and gymrats ( I think that's the term) . I am in nursing and most of the students in my class are females. I am also not interested in guys majoring in worthless subjects. l don't want to lower my standards either.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Aim at more matured gentlement. Men tend to get better as they age unless they are rotten then you will know it right away.

    A 25 something guy with a decent career job is a good starting point. A 30 something guy saving up for a house is a much better target to hunt.

    Signs that a guy has a clear head: savings, decent job, does not drive fancy cars, no or low debt, has assets or saving towards assets.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Are lower and change the same thing when It comes to standards? I literally sat down with pen and paper one day with every standard a guy would have to keep up with for me to date him. I made it my goal not to make anyour exceptions. The next week I met a guy who really caught my interest but was almost nothing like my list. We got married 9 months later and I have no regrets at all. He is literally the greatest guy I could imagine being with. We've only fought 3 times and they were all over three years ago. Sometimes you really just have to let God take over.

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What Guys Said 18

  • I don't think your problem is necessarily your standards, it could be that you put people into groups too easily.

    Like a guy who on first look just seems like a gymrat could be also really passionate about like travelling or culture. Or a guy who is majoring on a worthless subject could have a guaranteed good job in his dads company for example. Things like that are not uncommon at all, you'll just never find out if you're too eager to disregard people as potential partners.

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  • Nah, never lowered my standards.. but, make sure you are at an equivalent level of attractiveness as the partner you seek, otherwise, you'll be single for a long time!

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  • I have, not because I needed to, but because I thought it may be was a good way to open the doors for a wonderful girl... but it was a mistake.
    I'll never lower my standards again.

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  • No dont lower your standards because subconsciously you will never be happy with that guy. Instead try to look for what things you are doing wrong and try to improve. It may be as simple as not going to the right places to meet the right guys. Try going to social events with friends and talk to the guys there. Even if you didn't find a guy you liked at that particular event, friends you made there have connections elsewhere and you may find the right guy for you through a friend.

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  • Stop thinking all guys are douchebags, or stop noticing just the douchebags.

    Stop deciding people are beneath you because you deem their chosen area of study 'worthless'.

    Everyone deserves to be given a chance and to be treated with respect until they prove otherwise.

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  • All of that is fine except what you deem to be worthless subjects because that will vary based on who you ask and just because you think they are worthless doesn't mean they will, or most other other people for that matter. And there is no such thing as useless information or useless subjects, only useless people and those who can't see their worth.

    As for me I have never lowered my standards.

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  • then dont. they guys you describe usually dont have the same long term plains you do. but i feel there is one in these groups that you are over looking. yes he might hang out with them but in reality he is there because he feels he doesn't fit in any where else. if you find him at first he will not meet your standards but once you actually get to know him you will see he is what you have been looking for.

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  • What is a "worthless subject? " I studied theater, and own a media company. I am not sure any study is worthless if it has a passion behind it.

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  • I have and I regret doing that. They ended up really liking me and I knew from the get go I really wasn't interested. I felt like I had led them on, and will never do that again. If I'm meant to be single forever with my standards, so be it

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  • I'm on the same boat as you. I do care about the girl's major also and for me, it must be a STEM major. I'm not interested in gymrats either and what not.

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  • What exactly are your standards?

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  • I have no idea what my standards are physically speaking, but I don't think I would. I have to find her attractive, and I have to really like her personality and views.

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  • You talking about standard in what way? A perfect guy that meet all your expectations, then you are dream. My point is to be real, not some fantasy dream you hoping for. Look this up sex slave

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  • And that's why you still won't have a boyfriend.

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    • And worthless majors? College isn't about going after the major that makes the most money. It's about getting a degree in something you love and won't mind doing for the next 40+ years of your life. There are no worthless majors even if there are no future jobs open for that particular major. Their on the personal success path.

  • You don't have to, but don't expect guys to just flock to you if it hasn't happened already.

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  • I've never lowered my standards. They just got higher. They used to not be that high but they are higher now.

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  • What are your standards?

    Most guys are not fuckboys or gymrats. Most guys who approach girls a lot are. You want quiet studious guys in highly competitive programs many of them aren't as good at socializing and don't meet girls much.

    Try the engineering faculty.

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  • That's what I've been trying to get myself to do

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What Girls Said 10

  • i have, and i now know that it will never happen again. not settling.

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  • You don't lower than you increase the standards.

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  • Nope and I'm glad because I finally ended up with an amazing guy

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  • What do you qualify as a worthless major?

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    • I wouldn't lower your standards but stop judging so quickly. Just because people are in frats doesn't mean they're stupid fuckboys. They can be smart and respectable and be in a frat. Gym rats I just don't see what's wrong with that. They like to focus on their health so what. Doesn't mean it's all they do.

  • Guess what? don't lower them. I learned the hard way that patience is key. The time will come when you meet "the one", and it'll be your standards. Trust :)

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  • I have and its not worth it. Its best to wait for what you really want cus you'll always be hoping and regretful if otherwise.

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  • depends how high your standards are... i understand what you mean with the college boys though (i'm in college myself) so I would recommend lowering them haha... why not try online dating?

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    • Too many old people there.

  • You do you. Don't change for anyone

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  • What do you mean by worthless subjects? Just because you don't like them doesn't mean they are worthless or the guys aren't smart. Judge them on the basis of a conversation, then talk about whether your standards are being lowered. And no. You shouldn't lower your standards for anyone. What's the point if you aren't satisfied? But get rid of your generalisation and sense or superiority on improper basis's of you want guys at all. There is much more to a person than their scores or subjects.

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  • I think I have , He's a older guy that I knew years ago. I think I have lost my mind , What am I thinking. This question is a reality check.

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    • How much older is he? Are you married to him? Whats the issues?

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