I fear losing him and he knows it?

I fear him leaving after every single fight because he threatebs to leave. Two days agao he did just that.. Packed his stuff and said i needed to find happiness in myself before he could make me happy and that i currently drag down his happiness.. That we needed a break.. He continued to tell me over text that he loves me bur acted like a friend towards me. The main reason we fight is because when I tell him how i feel he takes it personally and then says i always start fights.

Yesterday i was booked into hospital. He did not rush to make sure im okay. When i told him over text i needed him to at least just talk to me he said he would later. Later he said he was tierd and went to bed. I am so hurt by him. I love him woth everything inside of me and i know he loves me. I am just no longer a piority to him. So this morning i started ignoring him. Ignoring his morning messages and his calls. He got rather angry saying he tried, i didn't answer. Have a good day.

I haven't replied since. He has sent me another message.. "Marco". I do not want to lose him.. I just want him to appreciate me. Am i pushing him away?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • "The main reason we fight is because when I tell him how I feel he takes it personally and then says I always start fights."

    During fights are you critical of him? Do you express yourself in a condemnatory tone? Do you routinely consider his opinions, and vice versa? Are the issues rehashed?

    A yes to either is suggests a lack of effective communication existed, obviously. Instead of resolving an issue, heated arguments can end up about winning the argument, which may critically damaging. Arguing your case should be done in a respectful tone and manner.

    If, on the hand, you answer no to all, then I assume his unwillingness to communicate with you is symptomatic of much larger issues: He is near, or nearing, the end of the rope in the relationship and doesn't care as much. Or, and there's a significant lack of compatibility between you, etc.

    "Am I pushing him way?" Refer back to the third paragraph. "I am no longer a priority to him." Think about that a minute. You felt otherwise, I suspect, when you were happy together. When you did things to make each other happy. Hence when you didn't engage in regular heated arguments.

    Try to get that back. And things just may change for the better.

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    • This is the beat advice I've ever gotten. Thabk you so much

    • Your are welcome.

What Guys Said 2

  • Sounds like a lot of emotional drama, and that can get quite tiring after some time.

    If it's not completely over yet, next time you express your feelings, try to do it when you two are hugging, cuddling in bed, gently talk about it. The worst thing you can do here usually is confront someone with your feelings, when there doesn't have to be a confrontation. Do it from a distance without that physical intimacy there, and unless the man's resolve is really strong, it can turn into world war 3.

    For now, maybe try to chill out? Relax? That's probably what he's looking for, someone calm, lacking drama, fun! How about fun? Is there something you enjoy doing? Try some of that, if not with him, then by yourself. And then maybe try inviting him along.

    By the way, the response to "Macro" is "Polo". Try to have a bit of a sense of humor.

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  • Your not pushing him away doll, he's just tired of you.
    time to face the harsh reality!!

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