I'm supposed to go on a date tonight but I am still hurting from a previous relationship? What do I do?

Guys, I feel so pathetic and confused by life. I'm so alone and sad. I'm 21 and I feel like a little kid all over again. Anyways, I had met a guy over a month ago; we never stated what we wanted from the other but we had sex 3 times over the past month, and we had texted and snapchatted a lot. I grew attached I guess... And he didn't. Actually I don't know because he refuses to talk to me. He has been ignoring me for the past 4 days since I made it clear I wanted to have something more constant and steady.

In the mean time, this other guy I met online months ago has been asking me out for the past 2 weeks. I've made up excuses 3/4 times so far, and actually one he had to reschedule. So tonight was the night we are supposed to actually go out for coffee and meet.

I don't know what to do because I am still crying from the previous dude. I'm still hung up on him. I feel disgusted by men in general... I don't want to kiss or have sex for a long long time because it makes me want to vommit now. I don't think I can let anyone in or start over again right now because I'm just so exhausted from it all. I want to be left alone. To work on myself... Yet this guy is like a 10/10, he is genuinely a great guy, and I don't want to miss my chance but at the same time.. It isn't the right time, or is it? Would it be good to see someone else to get over this other guy?

If I cancel he isn't going to want to talk to me again and will move on. I don't know how to explain it either because he will be like whatever

Updates:
I openly talked it over with him and he still would love to meet me and take me out. SO I am going to go for it... Apprehensively and rather doubtful but hey, I gotta keep trying and moving. I just gotta. Wish me luck lovelies and thanks for your answers

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Most Helpful Guy

  • I think you're right, he'll move on if you cancel.

    There's no magic perfect answer here.

    I think go, see him, if you think 'i'd never date this guy' then don't see him again problem solved.

    If he seems awesome but you're not ready, be honest. Tell him you're not ready to date, and you know that's true, because he's a 10/10 to you, and if you were ready to date anyone, it would be him.

    He will -probably- move on. Maybe in a few months you'll both be single at the same time, maybe something will happen then. He will know he was rejected for now, but that you likely would be interested if your paths cross again.

    On the other hand maybe you're so magically wonderful he'll say he can move slow.

    Who knows, maybe you will actually move on because he IS a 10.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • You shouldn't go on a date if you aren't over your ex, nor should you use someone to try and get over him. Just explain that to the guy, he should understand. And if not then there are plenty of other guys out there.

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What Guys Said 3


  • I am going through some serious heartbreak as a result of being dumped by my girlfriend who I loved deeply a month ago... I am not emotionally available now, and I know this because I've gone on two dates with otherwise beautiful women but had absolutely no desire to be with them, even if they wanted to have sex without my putting in any effort. I didn't feel like I was present on my date.

    Take time and shed the last relationship before you try to move on... it's not fair to you and it's not fair to the poor guy spending his time and money taking you out hoping to make a girlfriend.

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  • Take all the time you need to heal yourself.. there is to me no time limit here.. things will get better.. only you know what is the right thing to do

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  • Why did you set up a date if you're not emotionally ready for it?

    This isn't fair to him or you. Does he know he's your rebound?

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What Girls Said 2

  • Just don't look at it as a date but you just going out meeting someone new. And you shouldn't have sex with anyone until you guys both want a committed relationship. Take things slow as possible and see where it goes from there

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  • If you're not ready, don't force it.

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