We're both young and I understand a child can be costly and can take away from your youth but I want to have the child and when I got checked it was two months in I just couldn't get rid of it then. I'm now 6 months in and I'm wondering if I should tell him? I don't want him to feel obligated to take care of the baby so that's why I have not said anything.
*-If you want the guy to have a role in your life and in your child's life, you'd better tell him he's gonna be a dad. *-If you want your child to get the child support it's entitled too, you have to tell it the guy. *-Child support is a child's right, not the mother's right. But if the guy fails to pay it, the girl usually is the one who has to pay all costs, which is hard, thus sharing costs is a better idea:
A child can mostly take away from your youth? Soo not true, I got pregnant at 22 and enjoyed my youth. Yes, things will be way different but you can still go out and have fun when the time is due (it's just that everything has to be scheduled now). It all honesty, the news you're about to break is any casual sex partner's nightmare. He may encourage you to get an abortion. How do you feel about that? Whatever you decide to do with your pregnancy, it's only fair that you're honest with him.
"I don't want him to feel obligated to take care of the baby". It's his! He should feel obligated. Last time I checked, it takes two to tango.
I think you should make wiser decisions with the men you sleep with because they seem more like "boys" if anything (if thats their reasoning). I think generally speaking, women need to be smarter. It's great to have casual sex, but accidents do happen. Women need to know that they are potentially choosing their child's father. So if you sleep with a low life or a dead beat, that is exactly the type of man you will have in your life. Sleep with men that have more quality to them.
Whatever you decide, As said before he deserves to know (he may surprise you and react differently than you expect, hopefully).
If he's basically a good guy and you feel he can and wants to be a positive in the life of your child then tell him. If he's not a good guy then why would you want to involve him in your child's life? It wouldn't be fair to your child.
Of course you should. He has a right to know. Just because you THINK he might bail on you doesn't mean he will. Also, he is obligated to take care of the baby. You're being selfish if you keep your child from their father and if you are at some point in a difficult place in life where you can't provide for your child then you might need that child support money from him. Your child shouldn't suffer from your poor choices.
I always struggle with questions like these. Personally I've always wanted to be a single mother, and raise and adopt children on my own. So I don't know if you should tell the father if you want to be a single mother. I do know the child will most probably ask about his father one day so you should be prepared for what you will say to him/her.
One of my friends never knew who her father was. My friend didn't really care that much because she was raised by her stepdad. So he was her dad.
Some guys can freak out. He could insist on being in the delivery room when she doesn't want him there. He could cause all kinds of problems about custody and trying to control her and how she raises the child. So I can understand not wanting to tell him. I don't know what the right thing is to do, but I do understand.
Tell him it's his child I think he deserves to know
He is obligated to help with the child because he helped you have the baby He does not have to marry you but he has to help because you did not make the baby by yourself He was responsible for getting you pregnant too
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