What to do about a girl you like who has a friends with benefits arrangement?

I went on a date with this girl, we had a great time and kissed at the end. Later we arranged to go on another date, but she asked to postpone and then explained that she likes me but her ex wants to get back together, but that she doesn't trust him and always makes mistakes when she's with him, and that when they went out he would not turn up to dates/made no effort, and that she doesn't know what to do. I tried to be impartial and give her good advice, she then said that she might see if he can prove himself. We went out just as friends and spent all evening talking flirting and having a great time. She said he wasn't her boyfriend but more than just a friends with benefits arrangement. Should I tell her that I like her and would like to see her more, so that she knows that I am interested and am a prospect?

P. S. She said that she didn't think the arrangement would last long.

  • Tell her
    100% (2)0% (0)67% (2)Vote
  • Don't tell her, wait until she's ended things
    0% (0)100% (1)33% (1)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy
When she said that she couldn't decide, she said that whatever happens she wants to at least be friends.


Most Helpful Guy

  • This is a tough situation. It certainly wouldn't hurt to tell her you like her and want to keep seeing her, but if she's even willing to give her ex another chance that means he's still on her mind. It's even somewhat unfair for her to decide to go out with you knowing she's thinking about him. Be careful, this situation sounds like it could hurt you more than help. Can't be 100% sure, but still be careful.

    • I think that she went out with me and then after that he saw her and told her that he wants to change and get back together with her. I felt like I might as well tell her, because she said that she likes me and wants to see me again and the worst comes to the worst, she tells me she wants to give him another go. But at least I'll know, and she'll know that I'm at least interested.

    • True... but I don't like how she's trying to balance both of you, as if she's just trying to collect more options or use you as backup.

    • Either way, I feel like having an answer would be more favourable. We've semi arranged to go to a club on Monday, and I was thinking I would see how that went and then if we continued to go well, I would send her a message stating that I like her and that I feel she's better than her ex.

What Girls Said 1

  • this girl doesn't like you. If a girl likes you she doesn't mention an ex on the first date usually. Move on

    • She didn't mention him at all on the first date, it was. Few days later when we were arranging a second date. I had told her if she didn't want to to just tell me, but she said she really wanted to, and then went on to explain her dilemma.

What Guys Said 1

  • Befriend her if you want her as a friend. Do not befriend her with the purpose of making her your girlfriend.