Can I get a girls opinion on this love letter? I have been working on it forever and am about to write it (I take caligraphy). Is this too cheesy? It really embodies how I feel. Thanks!
My Dearest NAMEHERE,
You do so many things for me every day and you somehow only manage to make my feelings and love for you grow with each passing moment. To express that, I decided to write you this love letter to share how I feel about you. With each passing day, I look forward to getting up and going to school early in the morning. Not because of Physics, or Electronics II but because I get to see your beautiful smile and experience the radiant personality you have. I get to hear your wonderful laugh, your beautiful voice, and get to stare into your entrancing dark brown eyes. And as each moment passes and I get to hold your hand in mine, I only get more conscious of my nearness to you and your presence never leaves me. You are quite literally the sweetest, most compassionate person I have met in my entire existence. Never have I met anyone who could care more about someone, or be so understanding and loving than you are. And in a thousand years, if I could ever meet anyone like you I would be the luckiest guy in the world. When you do leave me even though it is a short while, it feels like a million years. I love your intellect and your ability to look at things and see them clearly without bias. Your ability to see the good in things and not be critical and cruel, like artificial sugar but genuine. The way your hair falls behind your ear and that cute smile you give me. It just makes me melt in my chair and never want to get back up again. I really hope we get to spend many more months together and get to grow and learn with each other. And possibly, never part. Saja kasih saudari. I love you Madeleine.
More than words,
Most Helpful Girl
Honestly? I cringed at the use of passing three times, try to find a synonym for it. Also it would be a good idea not to start the... 6th or 7th sentence as well as the third last with 'and' which I also thought was very cringe inducing. There is also the part where you talk about being lucky if you met someone like her or that 'when she leaves you' which I don't really understand because if it's a lobe letter you should be focusing on the now and the good in the relationship not the possible termination of it... or that there could possible be someone else just like her out there. I dont understand your artificial sugar metaphor... it didn't make much sense at all. I could tell what you were trying to get at but yeah, confusing stuff. Other than that I think it's really good and really sweet. Whether you take my advice is up to you but the way it is by itself is still really beautiful and I'm sure she'd love it. I'm sorry if my critisicim came off harsh though, I'm a bit of a writer myself and I tend to nit pick on this kind of stuff XD2
- Show AllShow Less