I've been seeing this 29 year old for two months now, and we're in love with each other. He's everything I could ask for: smart, artsy, experienced, a philosphy teacher at university (yeah, kind of a fantasy thingyy) and the most open-minded person I've met. He's also from Spain, so he's pretty liberal about our relationship and doesn't give much thought to the age gap. I consider myself open-minded too, but coming from a more conservative context (Mexico) I'm not used to seeing that kind of relationships and sometimes think too much about the fact that I'm 18 and he's 29. Of course, this doesn't mean I think I should stop seeing him, I'm just wondering what other people think about this gap... is it too much? Or is it not THAT bad because "hey, it's not like he's 40"?
For example, what would be your first thoughts if you saw us in the street (the difference is kinda obvious)?
I think that anything is possible. I would have been a nay-sayer before, saying that he's just looking for a young trophy to trot around. Now though, I'm 32 and I'm actually seeing a 19 year old woman. I think I'm more invested in the relationship than she is too. For her, she has an exciting, experienced, older man, with a career, and knows what he wants out of life. I have a young, vibrant woman, with the energy to keep up, and who I enjoy exposing to new things. I'm sure she'll probably move on to someone closer to her in age, but if not then I'll be very happy.
Hun, I know hundreds and hundreds of married couples, mb even a thousand.
In the VAST majority of the best-functioning couples -- where "best-functioning" includes sexuality, logistics, emotional compatibility, finances, and just big life decisions in general -- the husband is 5 to 12 years older than the wife. Like, at least 97 percent of the best-functioning couples.
Yr age difference seems big now, but it will seem smaller and smaller as time goes on.
Honestly, if you are still together just 1-2 years from now, you'll probably have forgotten all about the age difference, unless some conversation comes up in which it's specifically a relevant issue (e. g. timing of having children). Otherwise, literally, you will just forget that the difference even exists.
(Until he asks whether you remember something that happened 3 years before you were born, and then you can have a good laugh together.)
If he was 40 years old, you could say "well, it's not like he's 50!"
You are in love after only 2 months? That is the biggest warning sign that I see here. Real love requires knowing someone much better than you can get to know them in only 2 months. Is he your first lover? Perhaps you are more in love with the idea of being in love.
Statistically, at least some years ago, an eleven years older man married to a younger woman, had the be chance of the marriage working long term. It sounds like you're in a great relationship. The only question is: do you have compatible kinks? In my experience, that's the factor that more firmly cements a relationship.
Um you're Mexican, I wouldn't blame him of any age for being into you! haha we love Latinas. No that's fine I mean, it's all about maturity in my opinion. If a girl isn't mature enough to be with an older guy, than she should just stick to her age group, for example. Once you get into your 20s, age differences really open up and its acceptable, so if you're 18/19 and act and seem really mature than that makes sense and no one cares in my opinion.
The potential cracks I can see looking at this age gap realistically: 1) Both of you are in different stages of life you haven't had your fun yet he has and most guys his age are looking to settle down. 2) When he brings you to his social circle if they are in their 30's you would be sitting there not interacting as much
3) Two months dating isn't enough to know a person so there is potential he is in it for the fun not taking the relationship serioulsy.
There is a chance it could work out but from an outsiders perspective it looks bleak.
Welp, people will view the relationship as wrong. He sounds like a luck guy to say the least. Anyways I think it's a little much personally but if that's the direction you are drawn to who am I or anyone else for that matter to be the ones to tell you no.
My only concern is that he might be able to take advantage of you. Go for it I guess its your life will our opinions' really make you change your mind to be honest? I doubt it, it seems like you've already made up your mind.
No I'm 33 and my girlfriend is 44 so sounds good to me. As long as your both into each other who cares.
Well its bad... Because first you are barely 18 and this guy is almost 30 and this guy sounds really creepy... Also dating your student is really creepy and wrong...
I think he is in more for sex... Then anything.. and also you are obviously 18 so it's your crush and fantasy in play... And not any real feeling... falling in line in a week? LOL yeaa right! That's not love... You know nothing about love
But whatever it's your relationship so do whatever you want.. Just be careful.. I don't think this will work out for long term
My brother in law is 34 and living with a girl who's 24. It's not a popular decision in the family but that's because she's stand-offish and tries to keep him away from everyone. The age gap doesn't bother them or anyone else.
I think that you should just do what makes you happy. My aunt and uncle had a 13 years of age gap and they were the happiest couple I had even known until she died two years ago. He still won't get married and their love was stronger than anything. If you think that he is the one then why would a number bother you? Do what makes you happy and screw what the society thinks.
I would probably think he was your dad or your uncle if I saw you two together.
My concern is the lack of life experience. It tends to make younger people more prone to abuse as they don't usually know enough to be like "hey, this isn't okay." As you're of age, I can't say anything but do be careful.
You seem like a severe naive and stubborn girl. You'll learn the hard way though. This guy is straight up using you. It's hilarious you think your in love after two months, it says a lot about your age and state of mind. He's just enjoying having a chick 11 years younger to bang. You'll see.