Do girls get scared when a good guy shows them attention?

I mean seriously... A lot of the good guys on here, from what I've observed on this site, have all been called a creep at least once in our life...

I just read a question also, about a girl being creeped out by a guy looking into her eyes for a long time... That it made her feel weird... Do girl's for some reason, not realize that when you really like someone that they DO make you feel a little weird on the inside, that it's a little bit uncomfortable?

Same happens with me, yeah I start feeling the butterflies inside too, yeah it feels weird, and yeah it's difficult to hold my gaze into a girl I like's eyes... But it's a GOOD thing! It's because I like her! Not because I think she's weird, because that how I feel when I look at her... I don't go labeling her a "creep" after our conversation...

Do girls somehow just not realize how liking someone is supposed to feel? Because I don't get how they can go out with some bad boy that they claim to "love" yet they go and try to change him and whatnot and can accept him for who he is from the get go... Yet they "love" him?! Love appreciates for all someone is... They wouldn't want to chance someone they loved for real.

Half the time these guys aren't very respectable people, they do drugs, or have some sort of trouble with the law, or something, yet a nice , put-together guy that CAN be appreciated for all he is, comes along... shows a bit of genuine interest, and he get's labeled a creep... SOMETHING isn't right... :/

I can elaborate further if needed... Mature opinions please.

Updates:
My point... If a girl is going out of her way to call someone a creep just for someone looking her in the eyes, or treating her better than any bad boy could, she probably DID feel something.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Actually, I'd say that yes, it's often true.

    As you know, lots of girls go for the hot asshole. The guy who's hot and knows it, and she is just another notch in his long line of girls. Then she gets dumped, and she gets hurt. For a lot of girls, repeat this several more times.

    In comes the good guy. He's polite, he's social, your friends like him, and he's confident. He can send you genuine compliments instead of backhanded ones, he lets you know you're special rather than just another girl, and he certainly wouldn't do anything behind your back. He's great. And she isn't used to it. This guy often DOES scare girls, because he's a lot of what they're looking for (maybe with exception to looks, but that varies). He scares her because he seems like he's WAY too good for her. Similarly, a lot of guys won't ask out the super hot girl because she seems out of his league. A lot of girls get scared because this good guy is way beyond theirs. She isn't used to being treated well by boyfriends. She's used to being defensive, untrusting, and trying to get him to like her more. Now, she can't do any of those things. More than anything, it's the change that scares girls.

    For a lot of girls, they get scared and leave him. Should they ever need a reason why, she isn't going to say "He was too good for me", and he certainly wasn't a jerk. "Creep" is often the adjective used in such a situation.

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    • I agree... makes sense.

What Girls Said 4

  • In order for a girl to go out with any guy there needs to be physical attraction as well as inner beauty attraction. So whenever a female does go out with a bad boy it may be because of his looks and they then feel like as if they have the power to change him into a better person, where then they will soon figure out that no one can change a person but themselves.

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  • I don’t like having it served on a silver platter, it doesn’t make me appreciate it.

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    • So beating around the bush and playing games and stuff is what you like? Idk, but in my experience, that only sets someone up to get hurt. IMO being upfront and honest and showing someone genuine interest is the way to go... JMO

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    • Lol that the best you got? ooook then...

    • 3< ) <---- that's a fart... on you and your question. BAM!

  • Honestly, if a girl calls you a creep, it's probably because you creep her out, not because she is afraid of a good guy. Girls that go out with jerks usually have some reason behind it. Either they have crappy self esteem and no self worth, or they are jerks themselves. It seems like you romanticize certain girls and put them on a pedestal they don't need to be on. There are girls that are really judgmental, and any guy who doesn't fit their standards or is like them is "weird", that is probably why they are calling you a creep.

    Personally if I met a guy that seemed like a good guy, I wouldn't immediately fall for him. I would wait until I really got to know him before I decided he was good. Just because someone is clean cut and doesn't break the law doesn't mean they are a good person. A lot of these seemingly nice guys can be just as much of an asshole as the bad boys are, they are just more sneaky about it. I am really wary of guys that try to be super nice and sweet in the beginning, it just seems kind of disingenuous to me. Don't be a doormat, don't let me walk all over you and don't treat me like some fairy princess if you don't even know me. That's not to say that I tolerate any disrespect because I don't, but I don't like guys are like "Oh I'm such a sweet sensitive guy" and want a relationship really fast. If you're that nice and sensitive let me find out myself.

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  • Secretgirl : I do not understand that.

    Why is a guy who is not a jerk served to you on a silver platter.?

    Why would you want the personality of a guy t be the challenge you have in your life... Anyways I am not sure what a 'good / nice' guy is supposed to refer to lol

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    • I don't want to be with a door mat.

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    • I was not trying to change your life. Were you trying to change the question askers life - or mine?

What Guys Said 1

  • First on the point of eye contact, if you're going to look in her eyes for a long time, say something. If you don't know her well, staring into her eyes without saying any thing is kind of creepy. Why would she choose the bad boy? The bad boy is the lesser of two evils.

    She wants to have her own life; she doesn't want the guy that's makes her the center of his world. She doesn't want the guy whose going to ask her how many guys she has slept with, and gets p*ssed off when he finds out she's not a virgin. She doesn't want the guy who's going to be possessive, jealous, controlling, etc. She doesn't want the guy who's going to give her the grand inquisition if she has a "girls night out." She doesn't want the guy who's going to spy on her and accuse her of cheating. She knows all are the above are typical of the awkward guy, the guy who doesn't take action. She'd rather have the bad boy. The bad boy isn't going to disrupt her life, and he's probably a pretty good lay.

    The truth is there are not only two type of guys. There are many types of guy. A girl is always going to choose the guy who takes action.

    It doesn't matter "that you'd make a wonderful boyfriend" a girl isn't going to ask you out. She shouldn't have to ask you out. IT'S YOUR JOB TO ASK HER OUT! To hell with rejection. You're going to get rejected; deal with it. Start to love it! If you're the best looking guy around, some girl is going to reject you.

    Girls don't want to make choices. She doesn't want to pick the restaurant; she wants you to pick the restaurant. She doesn't want to choose between a movie or taking a walk; she expects you to figure that out. She doesn't want to kiss you; she wants you to kiss her.

    This is what guys don't get about women; it's what makes women seem so complicated. She wants to know why? She wants to know why you chose her. What was so special about her? If you can't figure out the restaurant, the movie, the walk, etc., you'll never figure out her. You make her feel like she's just any girl, and she loses interest.

    Guy think general; girl think in detail. She doesn't care if you'd make a great boyfriend for "some girl." She only cares that you'll make a good boyfriend for HER.

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    • I do ask girls out... I'm not super clingy or jealous or scared of a girl cheating. I trust poeple and only pursue girls I feel I can trust. I have good eye contact, and I treat a girl as a good friend should.

      Idk people say I'm a decent looking guy, good personality... I'm a pretty smart guy and like to think things through. I just don't know what I'm doing wrong and how girls could want a bad guy over a good guy. It doesn't make sense to me.

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    • @greeneyedgal; it's not a science, just experience. I've paid my dues to the dating gods in ego dollars. My ego has been beat to hell and back. I hope some guys would appreciate the "ego beat down" I've taken to give this advice. :)

    • Even tho I do not want guys to make mutual decisions, I like it when he can make A DECISION lol.

      I once had to spend like half an hour waiting to see if this guy wanted the coffee I made or wanted to go out to a cafe' ( I guess the question was, do I want to spend time with HER or my friends in town- he chose folgers ^^) You had a lot of good points about girls liking action, to know there is something real, & about not being a good Boyfriend in GENERAL, but in particular for HER- that was great.

      :-)

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