Is it likely that a guy will open up after two dates or should I give up and assume we're not compatible?

I met a guy off Tinder who, on paper, seemed to be very similar to me and a great catch. We have the exact same education and job, both are into sports, physically he is my type (at least in his pictures), he’s really kind etc.

For our first date we went for a walk – the second I saw him, I wasn’t *that* attracted to him. Objectively, he’s very handsome, but he’s very nerdy – I didn’t expect that at all. The walk still went pretty well, the conversation flowed easily. At the end, he asked me out to dinner two days later, which happened to be Valentine’s day. Be showed up with chocolate, and was really sweet – but the date, in my opinion, was a disaster. He talks a lot, but he’s SO formal. He also hasn't made ANY physical moves besides touching my back a few times. He seems like he takes himself very seriously and it felt like a conversation with a colleague rather than a date. He’s the same in texts. Never really makes jokes, is always straight to the point…. so I told him this via text – I don’t feel our tone is like a dating couple, more like colleagues who barely know each other. And he wrote back that I have a point and that he is reserved in the beginning, but that he opens up eventually. And then he wrote “the question is, do you want to put in the time?”

Is there any hope here? Should I just give up and assume we’re not compatible or should I be more patient? Has anyone ever experienced that a guy completely changed after he got comfortable around you? This all surprises me because it’s not like he’s not talkative…he just talks about work, politics etc, and nothing personal.


What Guys Said 1

  • I think if their is no chemistry and no attraction then it is not going to work. You already said you are not attracted to him. And even though he is nice he also seems boring and he has no spark. Will it get better if you keep dating him? I think it will not but it's up to you if you want to wait it out. I do give people a couple of chances before I call it quits.


What Girls Said 0

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