Is it wrong for me to feel bad that my unemployed boyfriend asks me to pay for our food?

I know he's not with me to take advantage of me because before when he still had work, he payed for our food whenever he asks me to get food with him, and we sometimes go dutch too. He pays for my food whenever we go on a group thing like a double date or hanging out with his cousins. And whenever I feel like I want food, I pay for him. And he pays for my Uber ride home sometimes. However, he just quit his job 2 weeks ago but he still has a little bit of money saved up. Anyways yesterday after class (we're both college students) he asks me "hey we should go get some food but you're going to have to pay for it because I have no money right now"... I feel extremely bad if I say no because I'm not hungry and I wanted to save some of my money too, but anyways, we go anyways, and I pulled out my wallet when we were ordering food and I can see the cashier girl snickering at me. I feel super embarrassed that I have to pay for my boyfriend when it's usually the other way around. I always felt like it was a turn off when a guy doesn't pay... Also today, I didn't feel like eating out but we were outside and he was like "wanna go get some pizza?". I said sure why not? So we go and he once again said "I feel really bad but I only have $3 right now so is it okay if you pay for me this time?". The pizza was only $5 so I didn't find anything wrong with that, but then he changed his mind and said that it might take forever for them to make the pizza. So he suggested that we go eat at the cafe next door instead. While we were there, he ordered his food and I ordered mine and the bill came out to be $16, which was more than pizza. I had to flag down the waiter to get the check myself and once again I feel embarrassed af, like I'm being taken advantage of. Should I be feeling this way?


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What Guys Said 2

  • No you shouldn't feel embarrassed, when married couples go out it's not the guy who always pays its whoever has the card, so for instance the girl who snickering behind the counter is an idiot. What if you two were married, or even engaged at that point there really is no such thing as your money and his money it's just your money together everything is pulled together so if the wife pays then the husband is kind of paying to because it's coming out of the same account , I just woke up so I don't know if this is really making sense to you but I know what I'm trying to say LOL. My point is if you feel OK with it because he took care of you when you when he had a job then don't worry what other people might think about it. Don't worry what other people might think about any situation.

  • I don't work due to medical issues. If he's able body to work and make money there is no excuse.


What Girls Said 1

  • if it happens too many times you should stop this. Tell him he needs to find a job and that you don't mind paying for him but it should not become a habit... You want a guy that takes care of you and mentally , financially ( although u don't need his money) etc

    Or whenever he says let's go eat just say you are short in money too and that he should make lunch or something?
    So when you're with him just pull your homemade sandwich xD