Selfish or Normal?

Is it wrong for me to want my boyfriend to put more into the relationship than he already has?

So, for some background, my boyfriend and I are freshmen in college and we have been going out for 10 months now. We had our random arguments but we came back stronger and our relationship is back on the right track. Since college started we have been in a long-distance relationship, but we text often and even call every now and then. But I still missed him very much. Recently he came back into town for spring break and I was hoping that we could spend some time together... but he doesn't make it seem like he wants to as bad as me. Of course, we are both "struggling" college students so we don't have much money, and he usually spends all his money on shoes/ clothes and games for his ps4 (which he bought). We can't go hang out at his or my house cause he doesn't want to come all the way to my house, which is 30 minutes from his, and his parents don't want girls coming to their house (or just not me since they think we'll try to do something, which I respect their decision since it is their house).
But something that happened the other day that really got me thinking if I might just want to be with him too much, or he wants to be with me too little, is that I offered to pay for a movie and dinner if we can meet up on a certain day and he totally agreed to it. But when I asked if for another certain day, since he likes Chipotle, I'll buy us some Chipotle and we could also go to the park or play tennis that day since I'll be up in the area anyways (btw it takes me $10 to get to and from the area where he lives) he agreed to the Chipotle part but not the spending time in the park/ playing tennis cause he says that it's too much work...

So which leads back to my question, should he put more effort into doing stuff with me or am I just wanting too much and need to calm all that down?

Thank You!! ^_^


What Guys Said 1

  • That's selfish.

    • ok thanks... but do you mind explaining why its selfish please

    • Show All
    • Hmm, that's so true... thank you I really never thought of it in that way. Omg thank you so much, I really appreciate it!!

What Girls Said 1

  • generally in every relationship has to be balance and give and take in both sides. What you describe here seems fine to me, just because he didn't want the tennis part of the plan doesn't mean anything

    • Ok, thanks for your thoughts. I guess i just love to overthink things lol