Is he not ready for a relationship?

Is he not ready for a relationship?

So I've been dating this guy for almost 3 months now and we met through online dating... As I got to know him, he told me that he wanted to take things slow because he gets too emotionally absorbed in a relationship which only leads him to getting hurt.. so it took us a really long time to even hold hands or kiss.. After dating him for only 2 months I realized that I was beginning to fall really hard for this guy but I became unsure about how he felt cause he was always being so cautious.. I had a talk with him on where he sees this relationship going because we did meet through online dating so I was a bit skeptical.. He told me that he likes me and he's physically attracted to me but he feels like we lack common interest and values.. He told me he usually dates people that he has common interest with but because we met through online dating I'm very different.. I realized that he started weighing the pros and cons about me and he's kind of over analyzing everything cause he doesn't want to jump into a relationship if it might not work out. i realized that he was setting up walls just so he doesn't get hurt and it left me more confused as to where this relationship was headed. After that talk, we decided to get to know each other better and our relationship kind of improved because he invested more time to meet me and he's been more affectionate.. We even ended up having sex but when I wanted to introduce my friends to him he told me "he's not ready." I never dated someone like him before so idunno what to do.. My friends are telling me that he's clearly not ready for a relationship.. What do you guys think? also we are in our early 30s so im looking for something more serious


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What Guys Said 1

  • I don't do indecisiveness. And I'm like you where its "all in or all out". So I wouldn't waste my time with him.

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What Girls Said 2

  • I think you should wait and try to break down those walls he's built up. If you really like this guy and you're falling for him, give him some time. Show him you won't hurt him and that you like him for who he is. Those are things that would reassure him it's okay for him to invest into you. You should cut the guy some slack, he got heartbroken by being too invested, he's just trying to save face in case it would happen again. So just try to help him through these over-calculatory ways and just show him what he could have if he wanted it.

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  • You need to ask him what he really wants, so your not wasting your time and can find someone that won't. Men are confusing sometimes.

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