I'd like to go out on a date with a guy but he's ugly. What should I do?

A guy came in to my work and started flirting with me. It became quickly apparent that we had good initial conversational chemistry when we chatted for ten minutes or so during my shift.

He came to visit me again at work and I had fun talking with him. He asked me if I'd like to get a coffee with him and I said no.

He's funny, interesting, charming and confident from what I can tell but he's ugly.



I want to say yes because I think that we'd have fun on a date but I can't get past the fact that he isn't a good looking guy at all.

What should I do? Perhaps other girls out there might be able to tell me what they'd do in this situation. :)

Here's a picture.

http://imgur.com/W3fETAk


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I don't think he is but everyone has their own opinion. I wouldn't ignore this if I were you. Physical attraction is important to. You need both physical and emotional. Be friends if you want but don't lead him on, tell him that's your only interest and there's nothing romantic between you. I seen a post here the other day from a married woman that liked her husband but never ever found him attractive but married him anyway because he was a good guy and "thought she'd become attracted to him" I couldn't believe this? Really? And now she wants to leave him because she thinks he's ugly and hates being with him now. Poor guy. Don't do this!!

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Are you interested in going out with a guy and having a good time and enjoying yourself or are you concerned about what other people think. Are you so self-centered that you will not enjoy yourself because you wouldn't be cool? You are 28 years old you sound like an 18-year-old girl. Haven't you outgrown that crap?

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What Guys Said 20

  • Don't go on a date, don't give him false hopes.

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  • pedro :) seriously u dont like DONT GO ON A FUCKING DATE!!! DONT!

    and dont listen to others, if u dont want to have sex with someone how can u want to get to know them? u said u are having fun but u are already pointing out that its a constant thing in ur head thats bothering u... u think thats going to go away? ill tell u it won't, i know :( sadly. if u think someone is going to bother u chemistry wise its best to just not start anything, even if u do get along, as "appearance fades" theirs will fade faster than urs anyway, so what u dislike is going to get a shit ton worse. while personality is staying the same. something u might "like" is not supported nightmare looks pulling down liked to i dont know thumb down emote or something lol. u get the picture.

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  • Find him a razor and a barber, and he'd be a normal looking guy.

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  • to me your a little shallow. to me he isn't that bad to me he is average. here is what i think about it looks get old personality is for a life time. what i mean by that is as people get older looks fade but the personality is what will hold them together.

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  • Appearance is part of the attraction, just be sure you don't take him down that road, if you already know it is too much of an issue for you. Just like @AleDeEurope said.

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  • he ain't a bad looking dude... he has a bad hairstyle... at the end of the day if you ain't sexually attracted to him even a little bit the chances are somewhere down the line... another guy will floor you and you will most likely pursue him and break this guys heart.

    so if in doubt dont take it any further than friendly chat because in the long run, he will be hurt more once he grows to like you more than getting rejected at the start...

    but i still stand by if he got a better haircut with a quiff and short sides he will become a good bit more attractive as it is holding him back in that picture.

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    • Haha. In his defense his hair doesn't usually look like this. It's usually in a shorter style. It was the only picture that I could find of him though.

  • Im not a girl but why do you care what he looks like. Are you a supermodel? do you have no flaws? go out for coffee get to know him and if your not attracted to him after getting too know each other than fine but to me it is a stupid reason to say no. Sorry if this is insulting.

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  • Wow if he is ugly then I must be a 1 you have some pretty high standards just telll him your not attracted to him I don't understand why would women feel like they have to lie and how lying spares feelings cause it doesn't.

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  • Lol give the guy a try he ain't that bad looking!

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  • So shallow.. don't go on the date, let the guy get a woman that likes him, and is worth his love life.

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  • I've seen worse... relationships built on looks alone are doomed to fail eventually anyway.

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  • Anyone else think he looks like a child predator?

    On a serious note. Are you attracted to him or not? You are way over thinking it.

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  • Always hear to your heart, never do what other people want to tell you! You will have maybe one which do really love you!!

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  • Don't do it.
    If you can't have a physical attraction, you are just wasting time

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  • If u dnt like him like that jst let him kno befor. . U jst want to b friends.. he's not ugly by the way... I imagined a fuking troll wen u said that.. girls r mean now I think I m ugly Dx

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  • Hey, why are you blasting a picture of me upon the internet?

    I kid, I kid... but if you are not attracted to him, then you are not attracted to him. No need to beat around the bush, if he asks again just tell him you don't find him attractive.

    And thanks for being one of the few girls on this site that are honest about they have to be attracted to a guy before dating them or whatever else

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  • Dang. I don't think he's really handsome but I wouldn't call him ugly either. I guess it's just a standards difference.

    Honestly if it bothers you this much just remain friends or let him go completely if he has trouble just being friends.

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  • I understand where you're coming from. Since you sound like a hoe. Fxck that guy come get some real dxck.

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  • well, this just proves girls are as shallow as men, if not more

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    • Perhaps we're more picky and "shallow" than men.

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What Girls Said 14

  • to be honest , i dont find him ugly his blue eyes, and fair skin is so cute, he just need a new manly hair cut, we willlook much nicer ,,, he seems kind and loving

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  • I don't think he's ugly and there's more to it than just looks. BUT as one of the guys said, don't give him false hope. If you're not looking to actually date the guy, I wouldn't go.

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  • If you like him and he likes you then what the heck does it matter what he looks like? I'd date him to see if the chemistry can be built on and if it can, you're not going to think he's ugly.

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  • Just go on the date... you are obviously intrigued by the guy so who cares is he is conventionally good looking or not? If you have great chemistry you may just begin to find him attractive anyways. If not, nothing lost by going on a date or two...

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  • Go out and have fun. You never know.. you may see past looks. Every one always asked me why I was with my last boyfriend because they always said I was way better looking than him and I would always say... its because he makes me laugh all the time and makes me feel good. We were together for years, but he moved away for a job after college.

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  • He looks average. You have high standards eh?

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  • He isn't ugly. He isn't super hot. Attraction isn't always about looks. Sometimes it isn't about looks at all. It's who makes you smile and laugh. Who makes your heart beat faster when you see them. If you can't get over the way he looks because you're shallow, and superficial then don't give the poor guy false hope. And by the way - no one's perfect not even you!

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  • I think if you can get him to shave properly and have a haircut he won't be that bad.

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  • honey he's not ugly that is just raw material you can work with. don't be so into looks go out and have a good time you have some chemistry between you. Take it slow and see what happens.

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    • Raw material that I can work with?

    • hair cut, mod clothes are small things he can change and become more appealing.

  • What the hell? He isn't ugly at all.. In fact he is kinda cute.

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  • I just think he needs a different haircut.

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  • Honestly he's not that bad looking its the hair he needs a different style, and you never know maybe you would like him and would hit things off really well.

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  • I've been there, sometimes attraction can grow! Don't count that out, but if you reeaaally aren't attracted to him and don't think you ever could be then you probably shouldn't go out with him. Sounds to me like you do want to try though, just one date wouldn't hurt anyone I shouldn't think! And like I said, don't rule out the chance that he might become more attractive to you the more you get to know him and like him

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  • maybe just be friends? I've learned that if there is no attraction, it doesn't work well. You could try, you could fall or him in the long run.

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    • There is attraction. Just not physical attraction.

    • yes, that's what im referrring to :)

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