I'm dating my old high school sweetheart who is going through a nasty breakup.
We have a differing opinion on an issue that has caused friction between us and I want to know guys' opinions.
When we make plans (and I mean day, time etc) to hang out and go do things or spend time at my place, he will sometimes not show up - and he won't call or text to tell me he can't make it.
That, in my opinion is disrespectful and is a basic dating/trust rule. If you can't make it, you call or at least text to say I'm sorry I can't make it.
Twice, he's texted me saying he's running late (to come over to my house) and then didn't show up at all and didn't call. He called the next morning at 11am. Ugh.
Granted, he's got some crazy drama with his ex right now that I won't get into, serious stuff. They also have a son. He's explained it all to me and says that when he stands me up, he isn't "doing it on purpose". He says he always wants to make it, but that his ex (they still are in process of splitting physically so she is in his living space part time at least) threatens to destroy his belongings if he tries to go out, and causes mass amounts of other drama. She gets physical with him (she hit him in the face last week) and even with her own mother. She's a handful let's just say that. Mentally unstable is a nice way to put it. His friends are sick of watching him go through this too, and his best friend sometimes texts me when he's there with my sweetheart and the ex to tell me how she's flipping out over something.
anyway, I can understand (sort of) that people deal with breakups in their own way and must handle volatile situations how they see fit.
My beef is this: if you can't make it- CALL OR TEXT ME TO LET ME KNOW.
He says I should just know that if he doesn't show, something is happening with his ex and her drama.
I don't think I'm being unreasonable. Isn't this request a basic thing - showing respect?
He stands me up- doesn't think he needs to call to cancel?
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What Girls Said 3
Why meet him he's going through stuff forget him0
you're not being unreasonable. You should always call or text if you can't make a date. I have had experience with this and its very rude to not show and not call to cancel, no matter what the drama may be. Things happen but be respectful of those you made plans with. I would have probably dumped the guy already. Simple requests are not hard to follow.1
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