Would you date a mother who's just 19 years old?

I'm speaking about myself because i had a baby when i was 16 and i had to be a single mom so young. I'm not saying that I'm a loser or something but i think guys don't like it. A lot of guys think that I'm hot in college and my class but when they know about my son they just runaway. Am i going to be single for the rest of my life or what? I feel so jealous of my female friends because they're free to do whatever they want in their lives not like me.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • i respect women who dont get abortions from knowing its wrong. but they also lose out a lot in terms of their potential

    men who date them have more reasons to get hurt and get less for what they put in by far.

    every single book and lecture if listened to on dating single mothers strongly and repeadedtly emphasize to avoid them.

    i can write a 5 page essay as to the risk involved and stats

    its something a man shouldn't naturally stumble upon, its something to consider and really think hard through

    single moms are always looking for a surrogate father for their child and bread winner.

    for the guy, the guy who fucked your girl and gave her a kid is always around, you have to end up being a step father, your money will be spent on someone elses child, you'll never be your gfs number 1 and your dating life will revolved around the child.

    its HUGE BAGGAGE. worse than dating gold diggers.

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    • Wow... Not all of us like that.

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    • single moms know how much their "market value" has dropped and this is why they all become humble and nice after. i m not being mean but lets not be oblivious to the truth and pretend single motherhood should be normalized or encouraged. a child needs a male and female figure that teaches them how to deal with and pick them for themselves. a reference point.

      "you become obsessed with what you dont have" think about how daddy issues form.

    • single parents marriages are at 75 percent divorce rate.

Most Helpful Girl

  • No, I would not.

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What Guys Said 29

  • Maybe.

    About a month ago I met a single mom. Her baby had such a beautiful golden hair and the most innocent big blue eyes I've ever seen. For a second I thought to myself that I could be this baby's dad, that this is something I wanted, but then I took a look at my life. I am only 23, I use a condom for so many times only to end up with a baby anyway? If I were ready for a kid I wouldn't be using protection in the first place, but I am not. Maybe thats whats scaring the guys around you. They dont feel like they are family material.

    I think you should try dating people who are in their late 20s and early 30s

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    • What? I'm not even in my 20s yet and I'm going to date men in their early 30s? That's not fair.

    • You had a child when you were 16. Sometimes you have to face the consequences.

      I am not saying that you can't meet someone around your age, but the chances are slim and the people your age who would date you will often have weird motives.

    • Yeah like sex

  • At 19 your gonna be hard pressed to find any guys interested in that since they're just so young, maybe they'll stick around for the sex but it's probable not gonna be long term. If I was theoretically 2 years older I wouldn't date you to be honest but even if you can't find someone now in like 30s you'll have a good chance of finding someone who doesn't mind.

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    • Why not?

    • I just really don't wanna have to deal with a kid and not i'm not really cool with dealing with a kid that's not mine.

    • Fair enough

  • It would need to be insane circumstances for me to date a young mother like that, especially if I met her as a mother already.

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  • Nope. You'll have to find a guy who also has a kid. Though, I'm sure there's a few guys who would raise another man's child. 19 years old is a very young age--particularly for a man--to face the reality of dedicating their life to another man's son. Where is the father anyway?

    Well. I can't say much. I would have been a father at that age if my girlfriend hadn't gotten an abortion. Thank God. Because yeah. 19 year old women wouldn't, in majority, want to raise another woman's son, either.

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  • I'm currently in college and I would net date a single mother. And you don't want to date us either. You and your child are a package deal, most of the guys who are in college aren't financially stable, not ready to be a step- dad, we have other plans.

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    • No one can force anyone to be a stepfather or stepmother! Dating a single mom is different in my opinion if he doesn't want to be in the baby's life I'd understand and respect that.

  • yes i would i see absolutely no issues with it but before meeting the kid i would want to make sure we would be more than a fling.

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  • I would yes.
    I have dated single mums before.

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    • But not that young right?

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    • I'm happy with my life but i need love because i feel lonely sometimes.

    • i understand that we all need love and you will find it.
      it just takes time you will find the right guy that want let you son get in the way of you love and getting to know you both.
      i know it's easy to say and please that be jealous of your friends and what their have and can and can't do.
      The grass really isn't always greener

  • I won't say never but VERY unlikely. A super hot perfect 10 drops to a 1 or 2 if she is a single mother.

    There could be some super special situation and if we had a very strong connection and chemistry and attraction and she was able to support her self and her child comfortable then I would consider it with strong reservations.

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  • Unlikely.

    First of all I don't intent to be the substitute dad. S
    Secondly a child puts a huge strain on a relationship as the child naturally always goes first
    Thirdly if it weren't just a mistake (condom ripped) it says a lot about the person.
    And last but not least I don't exactly am into girls who potentially sleep around and the number of girls do that among young single mothers is way too high to even bother expecting her to be the one exception.

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  • I would if I were attracted to her probably yes.

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  • Absolutely not.

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  • It would depend on whether the kid likes me or not... which I don't think it'd be too much of a problem... kids and pets love me... most of the time.

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  • Tbh I would never date a mother because I don't want to help raise someone else's kid so it would never get serious and I don't want to waste her time

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  • Some would, some wouldn't. My guess is they want to avoid any baby drama with the daddy since they are likely not the father of the kid.

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  • You'll probably have better luck with older guys. I would date a young mom if she could accept I don't want to get to know the kid unless we are getting extremely serious. Not cause I don't like kids. I don't want a kid getting attached to me, then it not working out with his mom, and him feeling like he lost a dad. I had this happen when I was growing up. Women suddenly broke thing off iwht my dad and disappeared.

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  • I personally wouldn't mind. But, I'll not have responsibilities over the child except later in the relationship.

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  • This question has got me. It means yes if she was hot and we like same things. However, I want to be free and want to move up in the world.

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  • if we clicked yes if we didn't then no

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  • I don't date mothers.

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  • You wish

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  • When a man want to date a women which is interesting and have a child, then he can do it. I would say yes and date her. Age and a child are not a reason of condemn someone, it would be wrong.

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  • Yeah of course long as kid isn't 1 or 2

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  • Getting pregnant at 16 is pretty trashy

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  • Nope, don't date mothers.

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  • Why not? Of course yes.

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  • I wouldn't. I don't think you're gonna have much success until your quite a bit older.

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  • Guys don't like it and especially at young age they are not looking anything serious. Since you have a child, dating you is automatically more serious than if you wouldn't have one. Then there is the whole supporting thing and all. They could feel it gets way too serious way too fast.

    I admit that I do not like single moms. Not because there is something wrong with you, but having a kid is such a big deal for me that I would judge your personality by having one alone. I know it's a shitty thing to do, but I'm just trying to be as brutally honest as I can. I am pretty sure I wouldn't date you.

    You being single for the rest of your life? Nope there are guys willing to date you, but you have to accept that the dating pool is way smaller because of it. When you get to your 30s it might not matter as much to the men. Well.. some men.

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  • Yeah. I'm sure all the other old guys with kids would date you as well ;)

    Good luck with the guys your age.

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  • It's collage guys in collage and not looking to have a family they want to have fun so they know if they dated you they'd be dating your son to cause its a package deal.
    You'll prob have to find a guy outside of collage.

    I'm sure you were jealous of your gfs in high school as well but it is what it is.

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What Girls Said 2

  • Being a teenage mom is definitely one of the poorest life decisions you can make at 16. You had a child out of wedlock, that's pathetic. I would not want my brother, guy friends or uncles to ever date a woman like that. Where were your parents? Your upbringing was probably crappy too. Give your baby up for adoption or stay single for the rest of your life.

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    • I don't have to explain to you why did i become a mother that young and you probably no nothing about me or my life so shut your mouth if you don't have something useful to say! stop being rude to people you don't know anything about their lives.

    • Were you impregnated by your rapist? if so I'm deeply sorry.

    • Ok...

  • I don't see why not? But i think that some guys are actually scared of taking responsibilities and just want to be free and enjoy life with friends more than having family time, vacations.

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