Ladies or men-- Would you date someone with a bad behavioral past?

This guy I was talking to said he had a bad past. His mom doesn't talk to him. He doesn't like the police and gets tense whenever they're by him. He was in juvi. He used to graffiti on walls. He vaguely told me about breaking into people's homes in the past. Did hardcore drugs. However, he decided to change his life around. He goes to school. He still smokes marijuana. He grows it in his home as well. He drives while high/buzzed. He says he takes risks too much. Despite all of that he's a gentleman, funny, kind and intellectual. Would you see this as a potential partner?

  • Um no
    58% (37)55% (36)57% (73)Vote
  • Sure if he's a good person
    42% (27)45% (29)43% (56)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Sounds like he still has a poor behavioral present.

    I wouldn't date the person (these days, though I would've in the past). I would be friends with the person and try to encourage better behavior though. It sounds like he could use someone in his life, but it sounds like he needs to focus on himself and keep the self improvement going.

    I'm just one who found that years of marijuana use wasn't helpful to me. (I say the same to alcohol, games, porn.) I could have been focusing that attention on more important and more beneficial activities or hobbies. If someone could get through all of that and live a healthy and beneficial life, then that history would make this person increasingly more impressive and attractive to me.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I would not.

    And considering my chosen profession of law enforcement, he wouldn't want to date me, either.

    Honestly, I'd report his ass.

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    • I'm going into law enforcement too. So we were total opposites. I don't know he seemed genuine but something was off about him.

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    • My records the cleanest it will ever be. I don't do any of that. I didn't know him that long , I'm just asking if people would date someone like this. I'm pretty sure I dodged a bullet with this one. Plus he dumped me.

    • I'm not talking about your record. It's the record of the people you associate with that they would look at. And then rule you out according to.

      Don't date people like that if and when you go to apply for jobs lol

What Guys Said 18

  • The guy has absolutely no respect for people he doesn't know. He doesn't care if he kills someone on the road and doesn't care about stealing from them. I wouldn't give a woman like that the time of day. The reason why he doesn't break into people's home is because he doesn't want to be caught again, not because it's wrong.

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  • This guy is fucked up,,, proceed with major caution...
    date him for long.. coz such people can hide who they are for first 3 months... wait and observe

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    • Reason I asked was because I never talked to a guy like this. He actually dumped me recently because he said I'm too emotional / extreme. I accused him of playing around with my mind because he leaves me hanging for 4-7 days at times. Saying he's busy all the time. @-@ I felt he was a good person but something was still off about him.

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    • Well some red flags were that he took me to a cliff one night while wearing a black hoodie. I was scared for my life at that time. He also had half a skull or some type of bone structure in his ash tray for smoking... He doesn't have a normal cell phone. He had 2 phones. He had a disposable one and an old blackberry. He said his kind of work he can't get tracked. So as much as I'm trying to chase him, I'm wondering if I dodged a bullet with this one.

    • LOL run as fast as u can babe... hahahhahahaha...
      This guy is a nutjob lol... :D :D :D

  • has he said that he will ever own up to what he's done and eventually face his fears or past cause thats the only way he will move forward.

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    • Never said he will own up, however he has goals for his future. he's very focused on his work. He keeps telling me he's a good person.

    • Well you dont have to say it but just get him to become wiser and grow and let him realize that he has to live with what he's done accept it or it will always hold him back.

    • Guys and Girls are natural liars but the hardest thing is for them to accept themselves.

  • I'll give it you straight. Someone who DUI's and grows marijuana is not funny and certainly not intellectual.

    People can change, but not this guy.

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  • No.
    I will leave the bad-boy fixation to the females.
    I am not interested in a female who has "a bad behavioural past".
    Past actions are indicators of future behaviour.
    Would I consider a criminal skank who is covered in tattoos and piercings as a potential mother of my children? Hell no!

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  • Why waste you time. That person will never change their bad habits. Spend your time on somebody without that "baggage". You can't fix people like them.

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  • Hmmm.. I guess it depends on how bad or what kind of bad past. I'd like to think I'd overlook their past especially if they have cleaned themselves up or made up with people that they wronged. But I could be lying on that, so I won't say that for certain.

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  • If they had actually changed I'd consider it sure, but if they still did stuff like they did in the past no.

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  • I would not be sitting in the same car with someone who drives while high

    And I would prefer not to date them

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  • He is trying to turn his life around. I say give him a chance.

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  • sure i would, if she is ashamed of it and realizes that what she done was wrong.

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  • Fuck that noise.

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  • I will give her a chance to chage

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  • "Would you see this as a potential partner?"

    Hahahahahaha, no

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  • Sounds like fun to me.

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  • I like a bad girl 😛

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  • No I wouldn't.

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  • 98% of the time people don't change. It's a depressing viewpoint but it's true at least in my experience

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    • You think so? He seemed very intellectual and saying he has to overcome his past and etc. granted he said he wanted to change his life but he still does reckless things. Just not as hardcore. So I see what you mean.

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    • Yeah, I doubt he would. I noticed when he was drinking beers and smoking, he wanted to drive immediately. He says he can handle driving like such. I had to offer to drive because I felt unsafe. I don't do any of that, I try to look at the person in whole. He still had some work to do. Something was off about him as well.

    • Whoa. Yeah. That's crazy. Definitely need to have the right people around and to be cautious around others definitely. I'm glad I had a gut feeling and didn't pursue this more.

What Girls Said 10

  • If it was in their past, maybe. I wouldn't date this guy because it's not in his past.

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  • He's not an intellectual for sure.
    Those people who smoke weed but are actually very smart or even genius like the guy from the TV show are probably not real.
    That guy was and IS just another delinquent.

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  • I would go for it, but I would have to set some ground rules for my own comfort. I would really disapprove of the driving while buzzed or high part as that's dangerous to himself, me if I'm with him, and anyone else on or near the road at that time.

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  • That's usually what attracts me to them in the first place

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  • If a man's mom won't even have anything to do with him, he's a total loss. Lots of sociopaths are funny, intellectual, can feign kindness and courtesy to get what they want. I suggest moving on... This guy's track record is lousy!

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  • nah i am good. Got enough drama in my life.

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  • He seems like a good time. Life is short, get a dui. Fuck it

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    • "Life is short, get a DUI. Fuck it." If that was serious: quote of the year. *applause*.

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    • Well, that's boring.

    • @Rawrzz I would still give a guy like that a chance and life IS short but if he's a complete fuck up, i'd rather ride with someone else.

  • He grows it. You could get arrested and get tied in just by association.

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  • Just seems out of control and would hav a bad influence on u

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  • I voted yes but after readying your question I say no. I'm a licensed therapist and I do believe people can change and escape their past. BUT your friend still smokes pot and grows it and drives while high. I support the legalization of pot, but you're friend sounds like an addict. Driving while high isn't cool. You also didn't explain what "risky behavior" he does. Does he sleep around without a condom? This guy may seem great but he still has some things to work through. He's going to break your heart.

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    • Yeah. Actually remembering some conversations from him, he says those are his addictions. He smokes about 3-4 times a day or more. I don't know how sleeping around habits. He didn't try any of that with me. But he could be doing that a lot with other girls. I'm not sure why I'm still fixed on him. He was interesting, however I know there's no future with this kind of person at all.

    • Yes it's smarter to stay away. Even if he's not sleeping around, he could be doing other risky things like illegal things. You don't know exactly what he meant by risky. Remember, even some criminals in movies seem charming. But they're still a bad choice. You'll have your heart broken if you date him for sure.

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