What do girls think of intellectual men as potential partners?

What do you girls think of intellectual men as potential partners? I mean men who are well-read, interested in ideas, perhaps writers or artists or scientists, who like discussing and debating abstract matters, etc.

  • Intellectual men are intriguing and keep my attention
    57% (39)42% (14)52% (53)Vote
  • Intellectual men are boring and I don't want to date one
    3% (2)3% (1)3% (3)Vote
  • Intellectual men are pedants and put me off
    3% (2)21% (7)9% (9)Vote
  • Intellectual men are sexy because of their intellect
    37% (25)34% (11)36% (36)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy
Updates:
I'd also be interested in hearing girls' opinions.
Thanks. Anybody else?

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Most thoroughly satisfying type of man there is.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • In addition to being attractive and having good social skill, intelligence is an added bonus.

    Without being attractive and having good social skills, intelligence doesn't affect your desirability much.

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What Girls Said 17

  • Honestly it depends. Some intelligent guys can be painfully arrogant and egotistical, making their only selling point correcting others and talking about deeply intellectual topics. That can quickly become repulsive. However, being a smart person in of itself isn't unattractive; it can be attractive so long as you yourself are an endearing person with more, enjoyable qualities to offer. In general, I expect the men I date to have at least common sense, so I wouldn't be turned off by a smart man with a good personality who wasn't an egoist.

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    • <3 <3
      If I were a boy irl, I would marry you so hard.

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    • @LeeDynastyy Yes the guy you are talking about is exactly what dries this well up when it comes to smart guys. Especially if a guy is smarter than me: doesn't bother me in the slightest until he uses it to belittle me or others or uses it to constantly dispute anything I have to say just because he is more intelligent than me.

    • That's so true. intelligent guys who are constantly disputing or trying to fix people's opinions are extremely annoyng. They need to learn to be humble with their intelligence and learn to be open minded about other people's perspectives. No matter how much you think you are right, there is always a possibility that you are wrong.

  • Intriguing and sexy both!! Importantly though, he has to be willing not only to talk about his own intellectual interests but about my intellectual interests as well. ;)

    Stupidity is a deal-breaker.

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  • ever since i was a kid, i've had to "dumb down" my vocabulary so that people my own age would understand me, but i got so sick of feeling like a teacher trying to browbeat her fidgety students.

    i wanted an intellectual equal- someone to share my passions and my big ideas with- and i found him in my other half. i love that i can use "big" words in conversation with him and don't have to explain myself.

    that said... if someone is "intellectual" only in the academic sense (read: someone who's university-educated and can spew off facts from a textbook but doesn't have any opinions of his own) then it's pretentious and a huge turn-off.

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  • I wouldn't want to be with a guy who's not an 'intellectual'. Sex is great, don't get me wrong. But the relationship woudl be doomed from the start if we wouldn't be able to have decent, non-superficial conversations once in a while.

    My ultimate combo is a guy who has me not only dick-whipped, but manages to challenge me intellectually as well. 👌

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  • A and D: their intellect is intriguing, would keep my attention, and is sexy.

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  • I think this is pretty overrated, in at least 2 different ways. Will explain later (on mobile, can't type much rn) -- just don't want the question to close before I can respond to it.

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    • ok, so...

      Overrated #1 is pretty much what's covered by @rjgraveytrain.
      MOST "intellectual" men are what I like to call "coffeehouse intellectuals". You know the type, and you know exactly why I'm calling them that.
      Most know-it-alls get over that whole thing by age 14 or so. The ones who don't are fucking insufferable. Like, not only arrogance, but THE ABSOLUTE WORST KIND of arrogance, too.

      Overrated #2 -- and this is really something peolpe should consider more, in general, when they think about traits they're looking for in a relationship -- is that YOU CAN GET THIS FROM YR FRIENDS.
      Ya know?
      I mean, really. You have a "squad" of friends for a reason -- hopefully, several reasons -- and, the things you get from those friends are LESS important in yr partner.
      That doesn't mean totally zero importance, and, of course, there's going to be a minimum level of compatibility here (if you are genuinely quick at sizing up the world and solving

    • problems, then, yr only gna get so far with someone who's suuuuper slow on the uptake all the time).
      But... beyond that -- things that you get from yr friends, you get from yr friends!

      Really, if you put too much emphasis on finding the same qualities in a relationship, then, there are at least 3 distinct things that can go wrong.

      1) Most obviously, you'll have to make trade-offs in other areas -- specifically areas that you CAN'T get from yr friends (like sexual compatibility, or the values with which you'll raise children, etc.)

      2) You'll have less variety in yr life.
      Really, this is a thing.
      I share TOTALLY different things with my husband, than with my friends, than with my business clients/network, than with randoms on the internet. I get different things from these different circles, and they each enrich my life in different ways. It's not the same old shit from all of 'em -- which is what it wolud be if I looked for the same things everywhere.

    • 3) You might even marginalize yr friends!
      Really -- if you have a relationship partner with whom you share most or all of the same kinds of tihngs you share with yr friends, then... well, what do you need yr friends for, right?
      I mean, it sounds like I'm being annoying for the sake of being annoying, here, but, I've totally seen this happen -- one of my girlfriends finds a new relationship with someone with all these "common interests", and, BAM she's gone for months, even a year or two... until she discovers that they DON'T share the more unique things that you can only get from yr relationship. At which point she kinda awkwardly re-integrates herself back into our girlfriend group... which works with us, because we are all really cool and chill, but that so totally wouldn't work with lots of other women. With lots of other women, that girl would be all on her own after the relationship ends. No relationship, also no more girlfriend group.

  • I prefer a man to be wise rather than a man who has lots of head knowledge. Intelligence to a certain extent is important but not priority to me.

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  • It really depends on the guy. If he was also able to hold a conversation and seemed to be nice guy then ya, I'd love an intellectual man. Being smart, is attractive. Though, if the guy was not able to hold a concersation or else egocentric, then no, I'd be turned off.

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  • Intelligence means everything in a relationship. Stupid people make stupid decisions resulting in stupid relationships stupid children and stupid divorce. I will not date someone with intelligence I question. It's a matter of fact without a doubt I can say I dislike stupid people

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  • obviously that s a must have.
    most of my friends are like that too.

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  • The first one and by extension the last one

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  • Well, you can't really choose two options, but if I could I would've gone with A and D, and not just one of them :P

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  • I had a hard time choosing between A and D. If he comes off pompous with a sense of entitlement, it'd cancel out my interest from his intellect.

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  • Very attractive.

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  • Smart is sexy but smart can also easily become pretentious.

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  • they have things to offer just like everyone else

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  • Absolutely irresistible!!! I LOVE intellectual men who can hold a real conversation filled with some good topics to go over. Nothing more attractive in this world than a man like that!!

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What Guys Said 2

  • Well I would hope they think good things lol.

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  • I just wanted to see the answers. Not that I'm intellectual, but I am boring.

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