Live in boyfriend of 1.5 years was secretly having doubts about our relationship and I caught him on Tinder. What should I do?

Up until a few weeks ago my boyfriend and I had an amazing relationship. We were on the same page with everything and were making plans for the future like an international trip at the end of the year and moving overseas together in a couple of years. We have been dating for 1.5yr and living together for 8 months of that time. He is 32 ams I'm 28. He's been acting very distant lately but I put that down to him being busy with uni, as he has been this way before during semester. He went out and I heard his phone ring so I had a look and there was a tinder notification!!! In shock I waited until he got home and then confronted him about it. He said it was nothing and he was on it because he was bored. I pushed for the real reason and he said he's been doubting our relationship (while I was completely oblivious) for a while. How long? Since 4 weeks into our relationship..! He said he went on tinder for am outsiders opinion on this doubt, I. e. wanted to ask single girls who assume he is a single guy about our relationship problems. I wonder how they'd respond to that. I asked if he told them he was in a relationship and he said he hadn't spoken top any of them yet. I pushed further and the real reason was that he wanted to see if talking to other girls would change the doubts he was having about the relationship. Stop that changed everything. He is seeking out new girls to see is he had any feelings for me still. That's cheating. He said he's encountered this doubt with all his previous long term relationships and it was the thing that broke each of them up. Now, the question is, do I stay and help fix this relationship that I thought was amazing, or do I now question every act, every word, every look that came from him during our entire relationship? I still love him but I feel the trust is gone. My last boyfriend cheated on me and I gave him a second chance which ended badly... I don't want to go through that traumatic experience again


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  • I'd either confront him about having tinder and see what he has to say
    Or I would either ask a friend (who he doesn't know, to 'seduce him to hook up' and see if he bites)