The "no contact" rule says that afer a break up you should go 30 days without contacting your ex, and not responding to them, in order to reset the relationship. This gives them the opportunity to miss you and helps you get some emotional distance. It's controversial, some people swear it works, some call it game playing. Have you tried it? Did it work for you?
- Yes, It worked for me!25% (4)14% (3)19% (7)Vote
- Yes, I know someone who it worked for12% (2)10% (2)11% (4)Vote
- No, I tried it and it didn't work12% (2)10% (2)11% (4)Vote
- No, I never tried it and it sounds stupid51% (8)66% (14)59% (22)Vote
Most Helpful Guy
When a breakup or rejection happens, a lot of men chase the girl. The problem with this is the the harder the guy chases, the more desperate he looks, which results in the girl rejecting him even more.
What the no contact rule does is it gives the girl an impression that you are a man that deserves a great woman. When women reject men, they unconsciously believe that the man will feel bad and start to chase. However, the guys who use the no contact rule does the OPPOSITE, which confuses most girls. Then the girls will start questioning, "Why isn't he chasing me? Maybe he does not need me because he knows that he deserves better"
Women think with emotion, not logic. When a breakup happens, she is doing so because she "feels" that it is the right thing to do. She will not regret it the first couple days or the first week. However, a whole month with no contact will motivate her to start wondering.
This is a much better option than chasing the girl. Even if it does not work, going no contact for 30 days will actually help the man heal from the relationship and move on with his own life and focus more on self improvement.1
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Most Helpful Girl
Umm I think the no contact rule CAN work, but not a guaranteed thing-in terms of getting back together, but I think it is a good thing to use in general. But first, let's describe the terms of no contact:
1-you are not to contact your ex. Period.
2-you have to sit down and evaluate the role YOU played on the break up, and then make some appropriate changes, as well as fill up your calendar DOING things.
3-if you are wanting to get get back together, the break up has to of been done by him, and not by you.
If you simply stubbornly decide not to contact him, it won't work. You HAVE to put the effort into YOURSELF. The idea is that when you DO talk, he will see that you have changed and are different.
The logic behind it: a lot of break ups happen after a fight, by not contacting him, you are giving him space to cool down. No contact doesn't work as well on women. When he does realize wth? She hasn't texted me at all? He might get a little curious because hey! You all were together x amount of time and probably both have a little bit of attachment. After a break up, neither side completely severs that attachment, so it's normal to wonder about each other a little.
Even if you don't get back together, doing it and working on yourself during that time means even if he doesn't contact yiu, you are in a better place at the end of it. Now you have gone a full month without talking, you have improved yourself, and you have a life the latest is full and complete without him!
I tried no contact once. Guy texted me within a week. We almost got back together within a month, but he and I aren't compatible and he didn't do the work on himself to fix his pcontrubuting problems so we did not get back together. But 7 months later and he still reaches out to me about monthly to do a quick catch up chat as friends.
BUT, in that month I joined a mom club, got some new clothes that made me feel attractive, got a hair cut, started making plans with the mom's in that group, hung out more with my friends and made my life nice and full. I also read as much relationship advise as I could. I reflected on all my past relationships and found the qualities I most value in a man, and then grew the confidence to wait until a man with those most important qualities came along. I've been dating this man for a month and a half now and omg I couldn't be happier. He treats me like no one else ever has! I can't stop smiling!1