Thoughts on Me Getting Dumped 4 Times During Dating Lifetime?

It's been awhile since I last asked a question on here. Throughout my dating life, I surprisingly got 4 girlfriends in an 8-year span (2 being last year alone). Each time, however lasted less than 2 weeks since I got dumped each time. It feels like I'm junk compared to all of the other guys around. It's been a rough year since I've been clinically diagnosed with mild depression due to my last ex.
Every since my last breakup, I have a very hard time talking to girls in person. However, I do very well using texting and social media when talking to girls. Once the initial shyness goes away, I do like to talk a lot about many topics with girls. However, no girls want to talk to me.
I know this is all my fault since I'm unable to become the perfect man every girl dreams of (especially with my last ex). However, I am working on myself to become free from my family's control and move to an environment where I can excel in.
I would like feedback and any criticisms (since people are mostly critical on the internet) about what I should do moving forward?


Most Helpful Girl

  • I see your pic, and you look really stiff. As in the way you carry yourself. You don't look comfortable in your own skin in a way?

    I would stop calling 2 weeks a girlfriend, especially if you are going back to when you were 14.

    It's good that you are putting your effort into self improvement and indeoendence. Those are both positive qualities.

    "I know this is all my fault since I'm unable to become the perfect man every girl dreams of (especially with my last ex). "

    In my opinion this is the most telling part of why you might be having women troubles. First of all, it is very negative. Now everyone is negative at times (and to your credit you followed up by showing optimism) but it is VERY self critical. You aren't negative about a situation or venting you are actually almost attacking yourself as fundamentally flawed.

    Not every girl wants the same things.

    • You are right on everything that you wrote down. I wasn't comfortable in my own skin. It's been like that right when I entered college. I am confused as to your definition of a girlfriend. I'm very self critical because I am a competitor and want to win. When I mess up is when I'm very self critical. I'm having time not being so negative to everything, especially to myself.

    • If I say I was "in a relationship" and I was only with the guy a month, people question why I call it a relationship. If you were with a girl for 2 weeks and she broke up with you and you retell people it effected you so deeply you got depressed it comes off as a bit needy-like you get attached too fast.

      Being a competitor can translate to ambitious, which is attractive to most women. But try to place the criticism on the event instead of attributing it to a deficit in yourself. Try learning from your past experiences.

      Instead of "my relationships don't work because I will never achieve any female's standards for perfection" try "hmm I really liked this girl and we tried dating, but things didn't work out because I blew up her phone constantly and she might have felt smothered. Moving forward I'm going to remember to leave her a little breathing room" (I'm not saying that was it for you, but it's an example)

Most Helpful Guy

  • if that's you in the picture you look like a mess
    fix yourself up find a style that suits you and please change your hair it looks so bad


What Girls Said 2

  • I mean... you're only 22 so odds are you've maybe only had one legitimate relationship. And even then, if it's after two weeks in average, then you're not really dumped... the dating phase just didn't work out.

    It happens. It happens to everyone, in fact. you're into someone and theyre not interested. It's part of life.

    Like I said: you're only 22. Stop focusing so much on not having a girlfriend and instead, focus on yourself. Girls can pick up when you're not happy with yourself.

    • What you said was perfect. I got really emotional and super upset for hours from learning the truth. I was focused last year in getting a girlfriend that didn't work. I've been working on myself and passing college and leaving my parents' house.

    • Good! It's easy to get caught up in the "why isn't anyone interested in me?" until you take a step back and realize "wait... I don't even like me. Why would I expect other people to?"

      I'm not saying this is completely your case, but it's true that you have to love yourself before you can love someone else (albeit cheesy).

  • you have met the right girl yet is all


What Guys Said 0

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