Is a player = slut?

When a woman calls u player.. is it same when a guy calls a woman a slut/prostitute?
My ex called me a player when i dint contact her for 3 months.. I dint beg and plead.. she is obviously pissed...
Player =slut? Guys and girls help


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Uhhh player is a dude who sleeps with a ton of chicks.. You didn't contact her that's not a player but a asshole move.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • No. It's not the same. It all has to do with control. Self control and situational control. Generally with sex, whoever wants it less has control. This sets up a game of chicken, where both of you are attempting to "give less fucks" yet not seem so disinterested as to back your opponent into a corner where their only move is to actually disengage from the game. Essentially both people are trying to say "Well I'm down if you are, but I could go either way". If you're both doing this, you're actually both players and generally this is what we're all trying for, to be evenly matched in skill with our partener. We don't really acknowledge the female player but she's out there... see Ilana Glazer from Broad City.

    Now generally women have control in sex simply because they want it less. This is because 1) women physically have more risk associated with sex (from risk of pregnancy to danger from a stronger sexual partener to the physical possibility of not cumming) and so it's not nearly as likely to be an entirely positive experience as it is for men. 2) though women's sex drives can reach the exact same highs as those of men... it's a finer tuned instrument. It takes a far more specific input to activate it and so it's much less likely to go off by accient.

    Being a slut is something reserved only to women, BECAUSE they are able to do something which men aren't. If they are terrible players, they can still have tons of sex. They can actually want sex MORE and get more. When men are overly eager, they're generally turned away. Not so with women, in fact you could say that calling a woman a slut is the projection of the man who slept with her. In truth he feels dirty for having sleapt with a woman who provided no challenge, thus meaning that he rewarded and incompetant player with sex. Any confident person would view having sex with them as a privalege. The accusation then is leveled doubly and premptively because the truth is that he knows he will have sex with any woman that makes it significantly easy. He doesn't actually want that known though and so the move is to shame women into being competent players. After all men are shamed into being competent players through rejection. Since men find it harder to reject sex of any kind, we slut shame.

    So no you're not a slut. You are a competent sex negotiator but remember you dont want her to bail on this game of chicken. So ease up the aloofness if she's pissed. You're backing her in a corner.

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    • Just realized this is your ex. She's just mad. You jumped ship... you're no longer together. Either she or you was an in expert player. Seems like it was her because she's the one whose mad about it.

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    • Bro... my friends say that wait for her to reach out and if she reach out then make a date and bang her,
      But only keep her as a fuck buddy / friends with benefits... just enjoy with her... what do u suggest?

    • I mean. I doubt it will work. You can't be friends with benefits or fuck buddies once you cop feelings. You already have feelings and you actually want to make this work. You're most likely lie in to yourself and hoping it will fix itself somehow if you cautiously approach it. It won't, you jus get hurt again and then as a reaction you'll spend a long time going after girls but only going for fuckbiddies friends with benefits because you didn't listen to your friends and got burned this one time. You'll set out to not fall in love. It's a bad way to be. Don't put yourself through it. Or do if you need to. Some things you have to experience for yourself... even negative things. Just don't take it out on all girls. You got a pretty shitty one here man. Of you don't make her far consiquences then you're only helping to keep her shitty for her whole life.

What Girls Said 5

  • your ex calling you a player wasn't the correct term. Since a player is someone that just goes around and smooths talk people into fucking them.

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  • I see a player as a slut yes

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  • Well obviously.

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  • Players play mind games. A male slut, like someone who is indiscriminate sexually, but honest... is just a slut.

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  • Its the same thing

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What Guys Said 10

  • Nah. Not the same. A player is a snake/cheater/womanizer. He's a fuck boy.

    A slut just likes sex. I like sex, but I ain't a fuck boy. I ain't a player.

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    • I guess she thought you've been a slut, but uses the player term instead.

    • Did she think.. all these 3 months i hace been banging other chics and i have moved on from her?

    • Yeah probably. Either that or she thought that's why y'all broke up. Because you were sleeping around while with her.

  • Obviously not. I guess in some extreme circumstances, like when some supermodel guy that is as witty as james bond gets laid too easily, it's plausible that he could justifiably be called a slut, but that would be an extremely rare thing, if not completely mythical.

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  • It would be the closest thing if he does have sex often.

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  • She mad cos she want the D brah lmaoo

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  • I am not sure.

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  • Man whores..

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  • man whore= whore/slut.

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  • They are close but not exactly the same thing. Any woman can be a slut. Not every guy has the ability to be a player. That is really the big difference between them.

    Sometimes these guys use the possibility of a relationship as a way to have sex, which gives a room to debate about whether or not a player misleads a woman, but generally the woman knows what she is getting herself into, and just using the excuse she got played so people don't think she is a slut. As a result any guy that misleads a woman, or that just like to act slutty get labeled as players.

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  • nah guys can't be sluts

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  • There is a lot of overlap but a player uses deception or the possibility of a relationship as a lure and slut is a more general term for a promiscuous person with very low or no standards. So a player can be a slut and a slut can be a player but they don't have to be.

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