I have many gay and lesbian friends and believe everyone should be treated the same so I'm not looking to offend anyone but really am just curious. Please forgive my ignorance. In many lesbian relationships, one partner dresses, for lack of a better description, predominantly "male". A mans style haircut, men's style shirts, pants, shoes, etc. why?
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I have several lesbians in my family - there seems to be a generational difference somewhat on this.
I understood it to be somewhat of an "identity" thing - my older decade older sister said she originally cut her hair shorter and in a certain style (in the late 80s) to try to meet more lesbians. It was sort of an outward sign of her inward personality.
My cousin in her early 30s, who is a lesbian is very feminine, however. All of her girlfriends have had long hair, wore makeup, occasionally dresses. She herself is incredibly fashionable. So not all feminine lesbians like masculine lesbians. There are plenty of femme-femme and butch-butch relationships.
Other women (and I've known straight ones too), may have a more "masculine" demeanor in general. They simply have similar tastes as do more men. Look at a straight guy like Mick Jagger - he clearly likes slightly more "feminine" attire. There's an overlap.
The other thing is that men's clothes are usually more comfortable and built for utility. I have a lesbian and straight aunt (sisters) in their 50s and they raise horses together. They wear a lot of dungarees, flannel shirts, barn jackets, boots, etc. If you only met the lesbian one, people'd call her butch, right? But really, she's just practical, as is her straight sister. But the straight sister has had more societal pressure shake up her wardrobe to be "pretty" and "soft" to appeal to men.