How much does lying affect a relationship?

I lied to him about ap tests. I said I got 3's (barely passing) when I actually got 2's (failing). This was before I liked him. We recently started going out, & I'm scared he's going to hate me if he finds out. How much does lying affect a relationship?

  • A lot (you're screwed)
    82% (50)64% (34)74% (84)Vote
  • Not much but getting lied to sucks, so don't do it again
    18% (11)36% (19)26% (30)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy
Updates:
I wish we could edit questions, but I know lying isn't good and does affect relationships. My real question is can I repair this?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Well yeah, it affects it a lot, but I voted "not much" because I don't think the context of your question is that big of a deal. I don't see why your grade on a test would affect your relationship.

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    • Are you sure that it's not a big deal in my context though? He is the valedictorian, & im scared he likes me because he thinks I'm intelligent too.

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    • Well your score on a test doesn't determine how intelligent you are. If you are actually intelligent and he likes you because of that he would be able to see it regardless of your test score.

    • That's true. Thank you

Most Helpful Girl

  • If you tell him its fixable. Otherwise you're pretty much screwed. Unless you have some psychological compulsion to lie to fck up any and all relationships for no reason other than fear or avoidance of reality like pathological liars or sociopaths etc.. then id say its fixable.

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    • Our relationship isn't very stable right now, so would it be bad to not tell him until a couple months?

    • You should tell him asap. Dont hold onto lies. Fess up before its too late

What Guys Said 7

  • There are two types of people in my life:

    1. Those who have never lied to me.
    2. Those who have lied to me.

    Most people have a very strong preference for a partner who is in category #1. For him, you are now in category #2 and you can never change that.

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  • Most of these votes are likely to be from people who haven't read your story. All they see is: "How much does lying affect a relationship?"

    The answer to that question is obviously A

    However, your situation is very mild in my opinion. I doubt he will truly mind. Tell him that you lied about those grads and explain WHY you lied. I am pretty sure he will forgive you.

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  • To me any lie in a relationship is one to many.. in order for it to be the best the relationship can be.. one of the things is to be honest to you other, I do not think I would get many dates if any if I was not honest to my lady friends before any date, if I did not tell her I wear diapers and rubber pants and why I wear them.

    I would not ever want a sweet lady that I am with to find that out on her own no matter how she found out.. I know for a fact she would say then.. why did you not tell me this about you.. I think and hope I get dates because I am honest, do not stray, and listen to their feeling always.. bottom line lying is not an option

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    • So do you think he'll not be able to accept that I lied to him?

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    • You are correct in a way as well.. and to each their own as to how they wish to go about telling things about them.. to me honesty has always been the best policy and never have I received any slack over it

    • oh im honest sir... but to someone im with? hell no... i know just how crazy women are... i keep my honesty at 90% and hovering... brother gotta be one hell of a fool too be 100% with Your woman if she is like regular women. my current girl is probably like 95%... but still.
      i remain the right to plausible deniability and non-disclosure. if she doesn't as... i don't have to talk about it. some girls call that "lying by omission" or some crap... BS... not my fault you didn't notice and ask.

  • it can be very damaging.

    as for your lie, it depends how much emphasis he puts on academic success in life, but it's really not that bad in my opinion. I personally wouldn't give a shit, in fact, I'd think it was cute that you lied about that.

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  • It helps for time being. Not long lasting

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  • It made me hate my ex in a matter of minutes because I found out she lied to me, so don't do it...

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  • that lie will be fine honestly just tell him, he's likely to smile at how scared you are about it

    just be honest

    lies are always bad for relationships though because they usually come out

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What Girls Said 6

  • Lying can impact a relationship a lot. Even if you think it's minor, he's going to see that your being deceptive. He is going to want to further ask questions as to why you feel the need to lie to him. Ask yourself this: would you want to date a liar? If you failed the test, you failed. Study hard and move on. Only he can determine if he wants to continue dating you. All I know is that once a person lies to me, I can forgive them, but I will remember this and it will impact wither or not I should continue dating you in a long run.

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    • I don't think its minor lol. That's why I'm asking this. I didn't think I would go out with him beforehand. Everyone else did really well. And he's the smartest guy at the school.

    • Just don't worry about everyone else. Your education is important and you have to be responsible for it, no one else. All you can do is be honest with him. Like I said, be prepared to answer questions.

    • Ugh I was just so embarrassed. :(

  • Once you lie to someone who trusts you , then it makes all your truths become questionable.

    All you can do is be honest with him by telling him that you were dishonest about your reslults, but you must have a reason why you lied? So explain what made you feel you had to lie him. Maybe he'll understand. If you don't tell him and one day he discovers the truth he may never forgive you and not only will you destroy your relationship, but your reputation too

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  • lol something like this happened with me

    I realised it was stupid, told the truth and he forgave me lol

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  • Its hard to regain trust after being lied to. you're basically between 'Do I take the anger from being honest about it, or do I take chances of him/her never finding out, but if they do they will be twice as angry'

    In my opinion honesty is always best, even if its hard to admit, you will be rewarded with less drama.

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  • Is this a parent or a boyfriend?

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    • I don't really see how or why lying about AP test results will affect your relationship.

    • I don't know maybe he likes me because he thinks im not an idiot

    • I don't think that it's going to be make or break. He would probably understand that you are embarrassed by your test scores.

  • A ton

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